thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
Keep Hoping Machine Running ([personal profile] thefourthvine) wrote2011-04-24 09:51 pm

217: Popular Fiction

People, sometimes you just need to put together a recs set made up entirely of stories everyone has already read. And sometimes it needs to be half AUs and half crossovers. It just feels right, okay?

The One in Which We Learn That You Can Put a Boy in a Monastery, but You Sure Can't Make Him Pure and Innocent. At Least Not Once a Fan Fiction Writer Gets Hold of Him. Patience, a Steady Hand, by [ profile] helenish. Inception, Arthur/Eames.

Okay, I will be honest: slavefic is not for me. I am the person who gets 2,000 words into a 100,000 epic slavefic, reaches the part where someone is wearing leather pants, and wanders off to find a different trope to read. I am in no way judging slavefic as a trope! I am sure it is awesome, and my inability to bond with it is entirely a failing of mine. I just prefer to spend my tropeish reading hours with other types of AUs.

Having said that, people, this is awesome. Partly that's because Helen does not skip over either the realities of Viking life (hard, and also cold) or of slavery (hard, and also awful). I mean, okay, yes, the slave does fall for the owner in this one, but at least he has issues with it. Also, Arthur is an extremely nice slave-owner, as Viking berserker slave-owners go (because I am acquainted with so very many, yes indeed, there's one living down the street from us, even; I try not to judge), but he's still kind of a bastard. This works for me.

But most of all, this story works for me because [ profile] helenish is magic. As she was writing this, I was gazing at the updates with a sort of wistfulness, because, yes, I knew I would read it - she could write a story in which Arthur is a fairy with sparkling purple wings that shed time-altering fairy dust and Eames is a dark elf with tattoo magic powers and I would read it. (Although actually that's a bad example, because of course now I am considering this, and trying to figure out if it would work, and developing a system of tattoo magic. Don't let this happen to you, people: Hypothetical examples are not your friends.) Anyway, my point is, while I knew I would read it, I couldn't really summon up a lot of excitement for Viking slavefic. It just didn't sound gripping.

I was absolutely wrong. This story is so gripping. And so awesome. And I love it. Even though there is not an ounce of magical fairy dust anywhere. Except for whatever went into the creation of the story, of course. (Probably [ profile] helenish snorts magical fairy dust! It would explain her terrifying writing powers.)

The One in Which We Learn that Hawai'i's Criminal Element Is, Frankly, Tragically Bad at Pickup Lines. I Can Only Hope That Law-Abiding Hawai'ians Are Cooler with the Lines. All the Girls out on the Stoop, by [community profile] mirabellafic. Hawaii Five-0, Danny Williams/Steve McGarrett.

I have been reading Hawaii Five-O. (And can anyone tell me, just to ease my pain a little, if it is Five-Zero or Five-Letter-O? That has been making me crazy, and while I think it's five-zero, there is no way to know for sure. Also, if it's a zero, then why is the five spelled out but the zero not? These things keep me awake at night.) I mean, I think everyone has; it is in the part of the fandom cycle where it's kind of like that kudzu you planted in your backyard last year (although it is, for the record, way more fun to read than kudzu). And I tell you what; as I read and figured out who the characters are and tried to determine what relationship this particular universe's police officers have to ours (my conclusion is that I really hope it's no relationship at all), never once did I think that what I really needed was a story in which Danny is part Veela.

I don't know why I didn't think that. I mean, I was looking hopefully for other common AUs. (Surely there is a werewolf AU, so why haven't I found it yet? And some kind of Harlequin-type AU? And while we're at it, where is the high school AU? They aren't my favorite, mostly, but I just can't feel at peace until I have located a few high school AUs. They make a fandom feel like home.) Obviously, I am just not as brilliant as [community profile] mirabellafic.

Because Danny as a Veela is exactly what I wanted to read, as it turns out. And this story has it all. The burdens of being part Veela in this day and age! Modern ways to cope with mating cycles! The in-depth exploration of the appropriate office etiquette when you discover that one of your co-workers is only partly human (come on, you've suspected it, it would explain so much) and has to fuck your boss or die (probably this part you haven't so much suspected, I'm hoping)! Okay, no, not really, but this story is really damn funny, and it has a part-Veela Danny Williams in it. In heat. I can't imagine you'd need any further reasons to read this.

The One in Which We Get to Watch Two Experts at Wiping out Wipe Each Other Out. In an Entirely Different Way, I Mean. It Takes One to Know One, by Bone, aka [personal profile] bone. Point Break x The Fast and the Furious, Brian O'Conner/Johnny Utah, although not in a way that will seriously break up anyone's OTPs.

There are some things you can only really comfortably say in the company of slash fans, and this is one of them: I watched Point Break - not when it came out, but years after it was released, and by my own free will. There. I've said it. I'm not ashamed.

It was an interesting experience on many levels. It was one of those deals where you can't stop watching or reading something even though it is, objectively, really really bad, simply because it is also so slashy you can't help thinking that if you hang in there eventually these guys will stop staring at each other and just fuck right there on the beach. It was also eerily reminiscent of The Fast and the Furious, to the point where I sort of suspected the screenwriter of TFatF loved Point Break, watched it all the damn time, and just wished - dreamed! - he could one day write something that good. But something maybe a little cooler. I know! Race cars instead of surfing!

So while I was watching Point Break, in the few moments when I was not being astonished at how much Johnny Utah wanted to fuck Bodhi, I was being astonished at how much Brian O'Conner and Johnny Utah would have to say to each other. Although I think, at the time, I sketched out the entire story like this:

"Dude. Hot criminals. They fuck your life up. Worth it, though, maybe."
"Yeah, I hear that. So, wanna fuck?"
"Shit, yes."
[They do.]

Bone also came to the conclusion that fucking was inevitable - well, I mean, she's an intelligent person, of course she did - but she found actual plot and feelings and stuff in there, too, which is why she is the writer and I am the recommender. And I am seriously recommending this. There's surfing. There's the FBI. There's sex. And there's no Patrick Swayze. (This is a good thing for me because I've still got residual trauma from his hockey hair in [ profile] greensilver's Festivid.)

The One in Which We Learn Never to Impugn the Honor of the Emu. Ask Yourself, Before Reading: Have I Impugned an Emu Lately? Relatives and Relativity, by Yahtzee, aka [ profile] yahtzee63. Sense and Sensibility x Doctor Who.

And from a crossover everyone (okay, everyone who lived through both Point Break and The Fast and the Furious, although I am here to tell you one is more than enough) knew had to happen to a crossover I don't think anyone even considered before Yahtzee did. Because, I tell you what, I re-read certain of Austen's works a lot, and never once did I say to myself, "You know what this 19th century work of mannered romantic fiction needs? MORE TIME LORDS. And you know what would buck up this wilting disappointed heroine? MORE TIME LORDS."

I was wrong. I see this now. I just didn't have sufficient vision, and I am extremely thankful that Yahtzee did. Because this is awesome. This answers certain lingering questions about the Doctor - When did he become Nine? Exactly how many people did he depress immediately after? Why did he start adventuring, post-Time Wars? - and gives an entirely appropriate end to a character who did not get all he deserved in the novel. (Yes, I love her, too, but Jane tended to leave her baddies alone and trust that they would grow bitter and regretful and probably spend a lot of time staring into the fire and speaking wistfully of lost opportunities. And maybe staring at the shapelier footmen. Or possibly I am reading too much into it, there. Anyway, my point is: Jane, sometimes you want to see an asshole go down in flames. Or at least ground into the dust beneath the heels of an oppressor for a bit, which is what happens here. Look into it!)

Plus, man, sometimes I wish they were a bit more creative with their companions, if only for what we get at the end of this story - seeing our world and our time through eyes as amazed and appreciative as Rose's when she sees some alien sunrise. (Okay, I admit it, I wish they would get a bit more creative with their Doctors and companions in many ways. Has anyone ever done a genderswapped or chromatic recasting of this show?)
par_avion: (Lost)

[personal profile] par_avion 2011-04-25 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
The current show: Hawaii Five-0 (zero)

The original show: Hawaii Five-O (letter o)
Edited 2011-04-25 05:16 (UTC)

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copracat: Lynne Redgrave and friend saluting the photographer with colourful drinks (acapulco!)

[personal profile] copracat 2011-04-25 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
It is 5-letter-O.

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mlyn: Ahmed & Herger (13th Warrior Herger/Ibn indoor)

[personal profile] mlyn 2011-04-25 05:18 am (UTC)(link)
I adored Patience, A Steady Hand too! And I'm the only person I know who seeks out Viking fic. XD

Dang, par_avion got there before me. Good thing I had something else to say.

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starwatcher: Western windmill, clouds in background, trees around base. (Default)

[personal profile] starwatcher 2011-04-25 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
I'm pretty it's five-zero. According to canon (third ep, I believe) McGarett's father nicknamed their family 5-0 "in honor of the 50th state". Steve's team liked the idea (esp. Kono) and adopted it.

And thank you! I didn't know mirabella was writing 5-0 fic; I'm off to read.

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copracat: (ace - best girl)

[personal profile] copracat 2011-04-25 05:31 am (UTC)(link)
I once made yonmei an icon with Penelope Keith as the Doctor. She would have played an awesome Doctor.

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china_shop: Diana from White Collar looking mischievous (WC Diana mischievous)

[personal profile] china_shop 2011-04-25 05:31 am (UTC)(link)
I like Point Break! Admittedly mostly for Lori Petty...
aris_tgd: Wheelchair Ballroom, text: "Dance" (dance)

[personal profile] aris_tgd 2011-04-25 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
Lori Petty was awesome!

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aris_tgd: I feel like a Vorlon on its back--I can't get up and it's my fault! (amused at own stupidity)

[personal profile] aris_tgd 2011-04-25 05:34 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, come on, Point Break isn't that bad. It's directed by Academy Award Winning Director Katheryn Bigelow, after all. Sure, it feels like it has about six endings and Keanu Reeves seems like he doesn't know which of his lines are jokes and which ones aren't, but ZOMG SHINY. Also, she was doing, like, new things with the genre, man.

Rather: I totally watched Point Break on purpose and I enjoyed it much more than Fast and the Furious, so I guess I'm out of the club. ;)

[personal profile] tevere 2011-04-25 06:10 am (UTC)(link)
Katheryn Bigelow directed Point Break? Maaaan, with such impeccable slash credentials, I'm disappointed with the slash quotient of the Hurt Locker!

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quiara: (silence will fall)

[personal profile] quiara 2011-04-25 05:53 am (UTC)(link)
"MORE TIMELORDS!" is the correct answer to everything!
Edited 2011-04-25 05:53 (UTC)

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sinensis: Steve, looking interrogative (H50) (sup?)

[personal profile] sinensis 2011-04-25 05:58 am (UTC)(link)
According to CBS, it's Five-0 (zero). That link also explains why. Sort of.

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[personal profile] tevere 2011-04-25 06:14 am (UTC)(link)
I too was thrown into such a dilemma re: Vikings and slave!fic, neither being my fannish catnip. But: Helenish! Somehow she makes it work, every time. (I was also initially sceptical about the one in which Draco the emotionally-abused-housewife bakes cakes for Neville. HOW WRONG I WAS.)

I think pretty much the one comment I repeatedly leave her is, "You made me cry through this whole damn thing, you bitch. (BUT I LOVE IT.)"
erika: (quotes: crazy is a possibility)

[personal profile] erika 2011-04-25 06:20 am (UTC)(link)
I was also initially sceptical about the one in which Draco the emotionally-abused-housewife bakes cakes for Neville. HOW WRONG I WAS.

OMG I READ THAT TOO AND I LOVED IT. (Sorry, my love for helenish can only be expressed through caps.) Sooooo much I showed it to my best friend and then forced her to read it even though she was like "this premise does not make me happy" and then SHE LOVED IT TOO and we squeed like little girls. In between crying.
Edited (the crying was important) 2011-04-25 06:21 (UTC)

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torachan: (Default)

[personal profile] torachan 2011-04-25 06:16 am (UTC)(link)
1. I haven't read the Hawaii 5-0 fic, but I loved Mira's Harry Potter stuff. She actually wrote a great Veela!Draco fic back in the day, which you'd probably like.

2. Is Point Break/TFTF a thing? Because [personal profile] norah wrote a fic with that pairing, too.
skaredykat: TLM - 50,000 C.E. (Default)

[personal profile] skaredykat 2011-04-25 06:31 am (UTC)(link)
re 2 I think the thing that may actually be more of a y'know, thing, is Point Break/TFTF/thefourthvine... :)

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out_there: B-Day Present '05 (Default)

[personal profile] out_there 2011-04-25 07:03 am (UTC)(link)
Also, Arthur is an extremely nice slave-owner, as Viking berserker slave-owners go (because I am acquainted with so very many, yes indeed, there's one living down the street from us, even; I try not to judge)

You know, given the "local reading material" that you've previously mentioned in your neighbourhood, I totally don't know if this is absurd sarcasm or ironic truth. I keep thinking about it, and I really don't know if there's a Viking berserker slave-own living down the street from you or not.

Clearly, I believe your neighbourhood is full of weird and wonderful things.

Five-Zero or Five-Letter-O?

You know, it's *said* as "five-oh" but I always assumed it was Five-Zero. At least the fandom seems to be shortened to H50, which is nice and easy (and doesn't start with an "s". I'm up to here with fandoms that start with S's, for no particularly good reason.).

And despite the impression these pointless comments may give, I actually don't have time to sit down and read these now. But given that I've never read the last two (Point Break/Fast and Furious -- those two worlds were *made* to be crossed over), I'm definitely bookmarking for later reading.

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dzurlady: (Default)

[personal profile] dzurlady 2011-04-25 07:39 am (UTC)(link)
and developing a system of tattoo magic
I actually have a system of tattoo magic worked out already. (Or, um, two systems, to be precise.) It is a source of great sadness to me that there are not more stories out there that utilize tattoo magic.
azurelunatic: The Space Needle by night. Slightly dubious photography. (Default)

[personal profile] azurelunatic 2011-04-25 09:56 am (UTC)(link)
I do not know whether you enjoy YA, or are willing to read the published works of Cassandra Clare, but her Mortal Instruments & related works have tattoo magic, and I enjoyed them.

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innocentsmith: ainley!master pointing accusingly; text: I see what you did there (dw: ainley!master sees what you did ther)

[personal profile] innocentsmith 2011-04-25 07:41 am (UTC)(link)
Has anyone ever done a genderswapped or chromatic recasting of this show?

Ha, well, arguably Stephen Moffat, the current showrunner, did a genderswap fic that just happened to be produced as a comedy special: The Curse of Fatal Death ends with Joanna Lumley as the new Doctor. Oh, and canonical Doctor/Master. :D

I'm not sure if anyone's done a fic series or anything with a chromatic recasting. I think maybe that energy gets focused more on hoping that the next cast change will bring some change, there: Paterson Joseph was being suggested a lot for Eleven before the word went out about Matt Smith. As for genderswap, there's a fair bit of "the next Doctor is a girl!" fic around. And I really liked this Nine/Rose actor reversal fanart.
azurelunatic: The Space Needle by night. Slightly dubious photography. (Default)

[personal profile] azurelunatic 2011-04-25 09:53 am (UTC)(link)
Eeee, lovely things!
reginagiraffe: Stick figure of me with long wavy hair and giraffe on shirt. (Default)

[personal profile] reginagiraffe 2011-04-25 11:50 am (UTC)(link)
It may be spelled five-zero, but they still pronounce it five-oh.

And even the first incarnation (which was spelled five-oh) was named based in honor of Hawaii's status as the 50th State.

So... not to much to get fussed about.
bone: (TF&TF: Dom/Brian)

[personal profile] bone 2011-04-25 12:10 pm (UTC)(link)

A rec from TFV! I feel like I won the lottery without even buying a ticket!

Point Break and The Fast & The Furious are both so near and dear to my heart. I know their flaws, but I love them anyway.

Kathryn Bigelow shot PB with Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze as the Objects of Desire, which was pretty unusual. I don't know that Rob Cohen intended the same thing, but it's hard to look anywhere else when either Paul Walker or Vin Diesel are on screen, so the result turned out to be the same, IMHO.

The FIFTH Fast & Furious movie opens on Friday! \o/
montanaharper: close-up of helena montana on a map (Default)

[personal profile] montanaharper 2011-04-25 06:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know that Rob Cohen intended the same thing, but it's hard to look anywhere else when either Paul Walker or Vin Diesel are on screen, so the result turned out to be the same, IMHO.

I have a theory that Rob Cohen had a huge hard-on for Paul Walker, based on that one shot at Dom's house where Brian is looking up the stairs at where Dom and Letty are standing. It's an amazingly slashy shot in general, with the expression on Brian's face just the definition of pining, but it's also shot through a soft-focus lens and lit so that Brian looks like a 1940s movie heroine.

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melannen: Commander Valentine of Alpha Squad Seven, a red-haired female Nick Fury in space, smoking contemplatively (Default)

[personal profile] melannen 2011-04-25 12:59 pm (UTC)(link)
I haven't encountered any were-wolf AUs, but there is the one where Danno is a wereshark (and it is quite good, too!)

The closest I can think of to a high-school AU is the one where Chin was friends with Steve when Steve was still in high school, but it's not exactly an AU.

(hi, yes, I'm experiencing the kudzu effect with this fandom too.)
james: picture of Scott Caan's naked torso (h50danny_tummy)

[personal profile] james 2011-04-25 01:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I second the wereshark rec! OMG it is fantastic beyond the telling of it.

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samvara: Photo of Modesty Blaise with text "All this and brains as well" (Default)

[personal profile] samvara 2011-04-25 01:16 pm (UTC)(link)
dark elf with tattoo magic powers... that was totally a terrible series of books called the Death Gate Cycle, if you have been so fortunate as to avoid them - keep up the good work.

I second the Danno is a wer-megalodon rec, it made me ridiculously happy.
jenna_thorn: auburn haired woman wearing a tophat (Default)

[personal profile] jenna_thorn 2011-04-25 01:42 pm (UTC)(link)
dark elf with tattoo magic powers

Ummmm.... Sort of?

I'm barely admitting to msyelf that I've a new fandom. At this point, though, I've joined the community on DW and signed up for a Deviant Art account. I resisted DA through all of the Potter years, but Varric and Alistair broke me.
montanaharper: close-up of helena montana on a map (Default)

[personal profile] montanaharper 2011-04-25 06:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Don't feel bad. Varric and Alistair are enough to break anyone.


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bell: rory gilmore running in the snow in a fancy dress (OTF)

[personal profile] bell 2011-04-25 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)
There's this great fic, Five Things People Might Have Read on Psychic Paper (If Things Were Slightly Different, in which Paterson Joseph is imagined to play the 11th Doctor. :3
skaredykat: TLM - 50,000 C.E. (Default)

[personal profile] skaredykat 2011-04-25 09:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, thanks for the link. I'd been rooting hard for Paterson Joseph to get the Doctor role when he was said to be in the running -- I loved him as the Marquis de Carabas in Neverwhere and some of his other work -- but that ficlet puts things in an interesting perspective...

(Though I did like it when Martha Jones being black was called out, but as (close to) a non-issue, in one of the Elizabethan-era Doctor Who episodes.)
grammarwoman: (Default)

[personal profile] grammarwoman 2011-04-25 08:08 pm (UTC)(link)
And while we're at it, where is the high school AU?

AAAAHHHH! My brain just flashed on the H50 characters in a "10 Things I Hate About You" AU, where Steve is Patrick (both Aussie imports!) and Danny ss Kat the loudmouthed, belligerent blonde! I think the Governor would be awesome as Kat's parent with weird dating rules, too. *grin*
mermaid: mermaid swimming (Default)

[personal profile] mermaid 2011-04-25 09:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh my God. Please, please write that AU. WRIIIIIIITE IIIIIIIT.

...hey, I got bunnied into writing an H50 werewolf!AU last week. I need to pass on the cracktastic baton to the next author :)
lastscorpion: (Default)

[personal profile] lastscorpion 2011-04-26 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
developing a system of tattoo magic

In Hackmaster, the pixie-fairy race has both tattoo magic and magical fairy dust. I am not even making this up. Link:

Thank you so much for putting up all these awesome recs all the time!
ceares: cookie all grown up (Default)

[personal profile] ceares 2011-04-26 09:51 am (UTC)(link)
he could write a story in which Arthur is a fairy with sparkling purple wings that shed time-altering fairy dust and Eames is a dark elf with tattoo magic powers I would read the hell out of this. Especially if it was an urban fantasy that still hit up canon.

Also, H50 neeeds more a/us, way more tropes and maybe a clichefest-trufax.
beachlass: woman wearing a white tshirt with a canadian flag and the text "fuckin eh" (eh)

[personal profile] beachlass 2011-04-26 03:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I love Point Break. Not as much as I love Helenish, and the Viking AU, but still.

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