Oh, man, BFF dating a vampire, yikes. That would be like when your friend starts dating a total dick who is in his twenties and has a band and calls her little girl! ONLY WORSE. (Yeah, a friend of mine did that. As a teenager, I did not know how to say, "Ummmmm, maybe not such a good idea? Because REASONS." Like, the words were just not in my vocabulary. Looking back, it would have made SO MUCH DIFFERENCE to my life and the lives of people around me if I had known how to say that appropriately.)

she does not actually do as much swearing at Edward as would actually be called for

...I just. I just don't think I can get behind a vampire story that isn't mostly about how the vampire needs to get punched in the dick until he gets over himself. Maybe if I were younger.