Things I did not say to Helpdesk included: "Just because I write 'Dear
Santa, I've been a very good Lunatic this year. Please send me a shiny new Macbook with all the trimmings! Here is a picture!' on the whiteboard,
doesn't mean that Santa will have gotten the message; your ass is supposed to know how things are assigned to Logistics, and just because Chip wrote a Dear Logistics note in the ticket doesn't mean that they got it."
Things I did do: give Fear & Loathing some chocolate: some for him, some
Lennon Glasses Guy is dabbling gently at bitcoin mining. I had some
"helpful" ideas. Purple pointed out that the usual suspects for bitcoin
mining are probably against all parts of the concept of a solar-and-bike-powered miner.
After lunch, a helpdesk guy had just pinged me about a particular
contentious open ticket when a senior engineer commenced letting off steam about a known issue in IRC.
The helpdesk guy thought I was talking about another thing. I helped him see what I truly meant. He had thought I meant I couldn't see un-triaged tickets at all, which was wrong. What I meant was, if a person makes a ticket and adds me to the cc, I need to see it before it's triaged. He
tried to make such a ticket and failed because that is not a thing helpdesk
can do (it makes them triage first). I walked him through creating it like
a normal user. He sounded shocked and hurt when the ticket he created
didn't appear on my board.
He had to go rethink everything. Next, the very angry engineer. It was a
known issue: helldesk notification emails were sending bad links.
Senior Engineer: WTF is with helldesk? I don't understand any part of it, and the link they gave me is 404-ing.
Azz: hang on, I'm chatting with helpdesk about another thing right now, but after that I will be right with you.
Senior Engineer: wtf wtf wtf do they even have QA?
Azz: *grimly* I think we're their QA.
Senior Engineer: *further detail about the 404 shenanigans*
Azz: Ugh, right, that one. I've CC-ed you on the ticket I've already filed, here is the ticket number, here is the link to the less-broken view of helldesk, and here is how you get back and forth.
Senior Engineer: I think you mean, *you're* their QA.
Senior Engineer: Thanks, this is a lot less broken. I'll bookmark that.
Much later, Researcher Polkadot said something hilarious in email. A
crudely made animation ensued.
( animated gif )
Later still, the guy who empties the bins came around. A brief but surreal
chat about names ensued.
Purple was summoned. We headed out.
I do not know what the m2ma would say about off label uses for extra large finger cuffs, but they had best not have splinters.
Purple cannot have fruit punch on account of it punching back.