thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
I think my Yuletide glut has finally run its course. To celebrate: small fandoms!

The One That Shows Us That "Economy Sized Jackhole" Can Totally Be the Language of Love. (In Fiction. Probably You Should Not Test Drive That in Real Life.) What's the Story, Morning Glory?, by [livejournal.com profile] liviapenn. Psych, um. I consider this gen? I don't know. Categories are haaaard, people. But if there's a pairing, it's Burton Guster/Shawn Spencer.

So, Best Beloved has seen a season or two of Psych. I myself have not watched even an episode, and not just for my usual "television, so hard, woe is me" excuse. See, I understand that it can be lethal to people with severe embarrassment squicks. (No, really. I hear there are people who have embarrassment squicks gibbering in St. Mungo's because they were locked in a small room with Psych playing 24/7. It was apparently one of Voldemort's crueler tortures.) Often, even the fan fiction is fairly embarrassment-intensive.

But. The thing is. The Gus/Shawn pairing is so appealing and so obvious that I ship them intensively just from the tiny snippets (certified embarrassment-free) that Best Beloved had me watch. It's one of my favorite kinds of pairings: They are super good friends! Who clearly love each other! And are always there for each other! Above all others! C'mon, guys, just make out already!

So I am extremely delighted by this, which gives some gorgeous Gus and Shawn backstory that you can read either as gen or as the prelude to, you know, sex. (They already have true, true love. Canonically. Like, the kind of love where you know neither one will ever have an outside relationship that lasts longer than six months, and any relationship that does last that long will end with the other party saying, "I'm leaving because I'm sick of being a distant second to your best friend." And then, if it's Shawn, the person will add, "You asshole," and if it's Gus, the person will say, "But I really want to stay friends, okay? God, I care about you so much. I can't believe I'm breaking up with you.") I myself read it as gen but remain convinced that there is sex in this story's future, because I like to take every path there is. (This is entirely true, and let me tell you: it did not make me popular back when I played AD&D. But it did mean I was always the one with a good map.)

Either way, this is an awesome story, and has the bonus of being about these fabulous characters and not containing anything that will make my fellow blush squickers want to die.

The One with a Title So Good That I Can't Think of a Better Title for the Rec. The Underwire Job, by [livejournal.com profile] brown_betty (whose user name is giving me a great deal of trouble for some reason; in my Kindle, she's Brown Bewtty and Brown Better and Burn Betty) and [livejournal.com profile] emeraldwoman (who has no unfortunate Kindle aliases as yet). Leverage, Alec Hardison/Parker (who apparently does not have a first name, unless that is her first name, in which case she does not have a last one).

And, see, this would be one of those fandoms where I had to use the power of the internet to find out things like, oh, the characters' full names, and also, you know, what it is, exactly. (A television show! Apparently about people who, in a strange twist of events, do not fight crime! They make it instead. I guess maybe the crime-fighting field was getting overcrowded.)

I just. Okay. I love these characters. I have no idea if they're like that in the canon, but in this fan fiction, they are made of love. It's like someone asked me what I would find appealing in characters, and then made two of them. (Parker and Hardison, for the record. I am sure Elliot also brings the awesome on a regular basis, though.) I have re-read this thing maybe 15 times since it was posted, and that's solely because I want to spend lots and lots and lots of time with Parker and Hardison. I want them to get married and have geeky, antisocial babies. And then I want fan fiction about the babies. It's that bad, people.

And then. Well. There's plot, and kittens, and World of Warcraft jokes, and pushup bras, and frankly this story makes me giggle with glee just thinking about it. I cannot even tell you how much I love it.

But mostly it's the characters. I could spend my whole life with these people, I think. (Except Nate and Sophie, who frankly do not seem that interesting. Should I find them interesting? Do they have a secret sorrow? Or, better, a total lack of secret sorrows? And, oh oh oh, can either of them travel through time? The only thing this story lacks to make my joy complete is time travel.)

The One That Proves That Real Heroes Are Just as Irrationally Careless of Their Hearing When They Aren't Saving the World. (Someone Please Tell Me There Really Isn't a Ballpark That Close to an Airport.) National Pasttime, by Dira Sudis, aka [livejournal.com profile] dsudis. Live Free or Die Hard, John McClane/Matt Farrell.

First, let me offer my caveats. I did not see Live Free or Die Hard. I have, however, seen the original Die Hard, and based on my knowledge of that, I am guessing that in this canon there is a terrible threat against a member of John McClane's family and, you know, loads of other people. (A city? The country? The universe? Oh, oh, now I want to see Die Infinitely Harder, which would be set in SPACE, and it would feature John McClane - and Matt, why not? - versus bad guys in a SPACE STATION that they're going to take over and use to hold the whole world hostage. I like my cheese with zero gravity, moviemakers!) I am guessing there are manly grimaces and various wounds and weapons and last second saves. I am guessing someone says "Yippee ki yay, motherfucker."

I am hoping, based on the title, that this all takes place in New Hampshire, but I'm not betting on it. (Side note: if they decide to do a complete run of state motto titles, I don't want to be here for Die Hard Is Okay, although probably that would be the one where John McClane gets the therapy he so clearly needs.)

In other words, I know very little about this canon. Apparently, though, Brandon from Galaxy Quest is in it. And apparently - I find this so unspeakably odd I can hardly type the words - he has sexual chemistry with Bruce Willis. (I didn't know anyone had ever had sexual chemistry with Bruce Willis. Imagine my surprise!) Now, I have avoided learning anything else about this pairing, for the simple reason that big age differences make me vaguely geechy.

And then Dira wrote a story, and I put it on my Kindle in a moment of weakness, and I was lost. I don't even know why this pairing is so appealing, or why this story works so well for me. I just know I am now grimly trundling off to look for other stories in this fandom, even as I mutter under my breath about how I don't like large age difference pairings, and I haven't even seen the movie, and and and.

But it's hopeless. I loved this pairing and this fandom from about the thousandth word of this story. And if you read it, well, I would appreciate that. It's nice to have company in love.

The One about the Gay Superpowered Flying Alien from an Exploded Planet. No, the Other Gay Superpowered Flying Alien from an Exploded Planet. You Thought There Was Only One? Moab, by Parhelion, aka [livejournal.com profile] cirurussundog. Zenna Henderson's People series, OMC/OMC. (Do not run screaming into the night! That's not always a bad thing. And it's very in keeping with the universe.)

So, first, a summary of the People series, which, for a change, is a canon I do know. (Pause while I regroup from the shock.) The homeworld of an intelligent civilization of alien humanoids blows up. To the great surprise of many, they do not send earth just one scion who will grow up to have a lot of abilities and an unnatural fondness of skintight primary colors. Instead, they have a sort of diaspora. A bunch of them end up on earth, scattered in the Southwest. They, of course, have special abilities (that comes standard with the planet explosion in the civilization building kit). Sometimes they fit in; sometimes things work out. Sometimes they don't. Eventually most of them clump together and head out for somewhere better than earth (but less likely to explode than their homeworld, one hopes).

As it happens, I like this series a lot. But I love what Parhelion has done with it so very much more. Because there are gaps in Henderson's series, and what she's done - well. She's created a Person (do they get the capital letter in the singular? I have no clue) who I find more interesting and memorable than any of the characters in the original stories, and she's addressed a topic that I, frankly, find way more interesting: were there any People who were, you know, different? Unwilling to be folded into the big happy People sandwich? And, hey, maybe gay?

(Look, I'm a slasher. This can't be a surprise to anyone reading this. Or, hey, if it is? Possibly you are thinking of some other [livejournal.com profile] thefourthvine.)

This is one of the standout Yuletide stories of all time for me. (Not, you know, standing out in the same sense as the Carebears BDSM; that also stands out, but in a totally different way. Yuletide is large. It contains multitudes.) The style is perfect. The tone is perfect. The character is perfect. This is the People series, but better. As in, whenever I want to re-experience that universe, I will most likely turn to this story, not the originals. I can't think of anything more I can say to convince you, but oh: if you like the People series at all, read this.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
Lately I have been assembling recs sets, clicking on links, and staring gloomily in dismay when I realize one of them is now friends-locked. Curse you, LJ Strikethrough!

Anyway. It's apparently been making me all slumped and possibly even emo, which eventually led to this conversation:

Me: Alas, my latest potential set also has an unlinkable story.
BB, looking worried: ...Did you just say 'alas'?
Me, swooning dramatically: ALACK. WOE.
BB: Okay, this needs to end right now.
Me: *dons black turtleneck, begins soliloquy to handy skull*
BB, wearing the "placating the crazy person" expression I know so well: Look, why don't you do a small fandoms set? They can all be from Yuletide, and that won't be friends-locked.
Me: YES YAY NO MORE TURTLENECK.
BB: Thank god. You were depressing the dogs.

(Note: for the record, I don't think I was actually depressing the dogs; any downness that can be cured with a can of fishy glop is not true depression.)

Best Beloved was absolutely right, on all scores. I don't recommend small fandoms nearly enough, as proven by the agony I experienced whittling this set down from the original short list of eleven (to give you some idea, the usual short list has four stories on it; I don't usually keep looking after I've already found what I want). And I didn't actually succeed in getting all the way down to four, either. Um. One to grow on?

I had so many possible stories to recommend - and so much difficulty with the winnowing process - because small fandoms just make me deeply giddy. (Pretty much all fan fiction makes me giddy, yes. It may be that I need to take more deep breaths, yes. But we're focusing on just the small-fandom-related giddiness here, thanks.)

Don't get me wrong - I love love love seeing what big fandoms do. It is, for example, delightful to see the way ideas spread, mutate, mate, and eventually give birth to crazed AUs in which Rodney is a salmon and John is a Viking. (Note: because my imagination failed to come up with an AU concept crazy enough that I could be sure it hadn't been done - god, fandom, I love you so much - those words were selected via random URL generator. I know of no actual salmon/Viking AUs, so please do not head over to [livejournal.com profile] sgastoryfinders and ask for the link. And be grateful I didn't use the randomly-generated AU involving John as no-bake Kahlua Christmas balls; that could only have ended badly.)

But with small fandoms - especially really small fandoms - you just have the pure essence of fan fiction: one writer, one source, mano a mano. It's like boxing. Only, you know, with a lot less risk of permanent brain damage.

So, here we have the results of five writer-on-canon bouts that the writer definitely won. And, oh, thank you, small fandom writers (and Yuletide mods): you have restored my will to recommend! (And lifted the cloud of gloom which I was apparently bringing into the household, so Best Beloved thanks you, too.)

The One That Features Sex with Gazelles. Well. Okay. Really, It Just Mentions Sex with Gazelles, but It's Not Like You Wanted to Know the Details, Am I Right? In the House of Dust, by [livejournal.com profile] kindkit. Gilgamesh, Gilgamesh/Enkidu.

I still remember reading this story during the Annual Yuletide Glut. (You know. The thing where you wake up on New Year's Eve with only a vague memory of where you've been and what you've been doing, a serious headache, a suspicion that some members of your family are probably mad at you, and a conviction that a whole bunch of people recently had sex right near you. And you totally haven't been drinking.) My mouth dropped open, my heart exploded, and I fled to the comments page and left incoherent feedback. (All Yuletide feedback is incoherent, I find, especially after the first dozen or so stories. Someone needs to do a study on the mind-altering affects of Yuletide, seriously.)

And, see, as it happens, I am a hardcore Gilgamesh/Enkidu shipper. (As far as I can tell, so were the original authors of the Epic of Gilgamesh. B.C. slashers for the win!) But you don't need to be - you don't even need to know who Gilgamesh is - to read this story, because [livejournal.com profile] kindkit tells you everything you need to know in the story notes. (Note that you will be spoiled for the story of Gilgamesh by reading this. But, frankly, the thing's been around for more than two millennia; I think the spoiler space is way over the horizon on that one.)

What's it about? Well, I'm going to try to avoid going all literary analysis (I think that's one of those things you're not supposed to try at home, right?) on you, here, but: clay! Writing! Immortality! And the not-so-much immortality! There are so many lines on this one that make me want to scamper around in circles until I collapse in a delighted heap, but I'm not going to quote them. Instead, I'm going to say: get you to this story. It is gorgeous and perfect and filled with much deeper thoughts than I ever manage to think. (Also: Enkidu/Gilgamesh OTP SQUEEEEE!*)

The One That Makes Me Wonder If Maybe My Car Is Cheating on Me. Screenwriter's Blues, by [livejournal.com profile] minim_calibre. Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, Neil Patrick Harris/Toyota Camry, Neil Patrick Harris/pretty much the whole world, Harold Lee/Kumar Patel.

Do I need to explain to you why you need to read this? Not if you've been paying attention. I mean, it's the adventures of Neil Patrick Harris and his stolen gay love interest, who is a car. And there are strippers.

...And, okay, I need to interrupt this story summary for an announcement: NEIL PATRICK HARRIS IS A REAL PERSON. I went to check IMDb to see if got the names right, and the credit for "Neil Patrick Harris" was, well, Neil Patrick Harris. He was playing himself in this movie! Okay. Okay, probably you all knew that. But why didn't you tell me? (Best Beloved says he also came out recently. Where the fuck have I been?) If I had known this, it would've added a whole new layer to my nuanced understanding of Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle (which currently stands at "Bad shit happens to some stoned hungry guys. Hee!").

Of course, knowing that Neil Patrick Harris was not just some guy they made up for the movie would've probably prevented me from reading this story; apparently my celebrity squick doesn't work retroactively, though, because I am still totally in love with this. Because, come on: it is about a guy and his car. (Actually, someone else's car, but the heart wants what it wants.) It is about true love. And it, all by itself, is a perfect justification of the use of second person narration in fiction. What more do you want? (Also: REAL PERSON OMG.)

The One in Which Character Death Is a First Principle. The End and Other Stories, by [livejournal.com profile] kaneko. Dead Like Me, Rube Sofer/Mason McAdam.

Okay. I don't know this fandom at all. (I know there's a dead girl, but that can be said about so many fandoms. Although I think usually dead girls in other fandoms don't have quite the same inclination toward sarcasm, nor are they usually as active.) But I adore this story. The pairing is actually kind of a secondary thing for me, here; I love the world this story is set in, the characters, the whole concept (a crisis in the world of the dead, which seems, as portrayed here, to be a lot like life, except the jobs are shittier and your extracurricular obligations involve touching other people's souls in a way Barbara Cartland would never write about). This whole thing is - it's just really fun. I dug up the link recently, to recommend it to someone (who, as a reward, informed me that the main character of this show is killed by a toilet seat), and I was compelled to re-read the whole thing, because it makes me smile that much.

And I'm not sure why, really. This should be a sad story in a sad fandom, and instead it's funny and mostly light, with interludes of stress and cooking and sex and just the faintest hint of tragedy. Perfect, really. And I'm not going to go for the obvious thing here ("just like life" blah blah blah "deeper meaning" blah); I'm just going to say that this is a death story that makes me very happy. (Also: Wow, is there a worse way to go than getting killed by a toilet seat? I would not want to have to write the eulogy for that one, let me tell you.)

The One That Proves That My Childhood Wish to Live in a House with Secret Passages and Rooms and Dungeons Would Probably Not Have Worked out All That Well in Reality. Oh, the Pain of Disillusionment. A Maze of Twisty Passages, All Alike, by Merry, aka [livejournal.com profile] merryish. Vorkosigan series, gen.

You know, it occurs to me that it's kind of strange that the Vorkosigan series is a small fandom, since it seems like 75% of all fans have read at least a few of the books. (Which is a good thing, because you need to know at least some of the universe for this story to work for you. It's also a very right thing, because in many ways I think Bujold would write even better fan fiction than she does novels, but that's a whole other deal.) But when the stories that exist are as good as this one, it kind of makes up for it, you know?

One of the things that's weird about small fandoms for me is - okay. I enjoy stories about minor characters in large fandoms, but not immensely. But in small fandoms, I really love stories about the supporting cast. It's almost as though stories in really small fandoms are more like remixes (in the Remix challenge sense; I don't mean derivative, not at all) of the canon than traditional-style fan fiction - they're recutting and refining and switching up the points of view and revealing the other side of the canvas and just generally revealing the canon.

So my point is, this is a Vorkosigan story that is not really about Miles. Oh, Miles still causes the problem - Miles is the epicenter of trouble in the Vorkosigan universe - but Ivan and Gregor deal with it. How awesome is that? Ivan gets to reveal unexpected competencies, and Gregor gets to reveal unexpected skills, and they work pretty well as a team, and it's just way cool.

Also, it's funny. There's disappearing corpses and head injuries and clubbing first, asking questions later, and while that would not precisely be a recipe for happiness in real life (for one thing, I like my real life to be as corpse-free as possible, even if the corpses do choose to stay put), it is totally a recipe for joy in the Vorkosigan universe. (Also: No one says "That idiot Ivan" even once. I didn't know you could do that!)

The One That Will, Guaranteed, Make You Never Want to Look at, Let Alone Eat, Fruit-Flavored Ice Cream Toppings Ever Again. Second Verse, Not Exactly the Same As the First, by [livejournal.com profile] julad. Askewniverse, Dante Hicks/Randal Graves (and Jay/Silent Bob).

I remember seeing Clerks for the first time; at the end, I said to Best Beloved, "I think Dante should've ended up with Randal." So what if I had to wait a decade? I got the ending I wanted, and here it is.

Oh, sure, there's plot in this story (as much as there was in the movie, anyway), and there's banter, and there's humor, and, you know, all kinds of good stuff. Wheeee! But the really crucial point, the one I keep coming back to, is: YAY OMG I GOT THE ENDING I WANTED. (Capslock of glee totally necessary to convey the headiness of my emotion.)

And, I mean - I can't really say anything more about the story. If you watched the movie and you're a slasher at all, you'll want to read this, and if you like humor you'll probably want to read it no matter what, and if neither of those categories applies to you, let me know and I'll rec you something as a substitute. There you go.

So instead I'm going to talk about one of the weird aspects of small fandoms, which is that sometimes a story will basically close out a small fandom for me. I finish reading the story, and instead of thinking more more more, as I typically do with great stories, I just sort of sigh happily: Perfect. Done now. (Not literally done, of course; I typically scroll right back up and re-read the story immediately. But replete, if you see what I mean: totally satisfied, because with the addition of this story, the canon feels complete to me.) Resonant's Higher Education is one example of that kind of story. And this one is another. I've read other stories in this fandom, and I'm sure I will again, but the Clerks canon became complete for me the minute I finished this story.

(In other words: I GOT THE ENDING I WANTED OMG YAY!)

-Footnote-

* I have just had my brain flattened by what is possibly the worst crossover idea of all time: Gilgamesh x Highlander. No, seriously - what if he kept the immortality flower and started the whole there-can-be-only-one thing off? I, I am just so very tempted, and - please, someone please convince me it is a terrible idea to write this crossover of badness (featuring a fandom I don't even know). Very very quickly. (Or, ideally, link me to where it's already been written. Surely it's already been written?) Fannish intervention! Stat! This is my cry for help!
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
I have a feeling I'm going to regret this. But, see, recently [livejournal.com profile] liviapenn reminded me that I have been remiss in my duties as a fan. Specifically, I have neglected my Fannish Heritage. (Capitals inserted to make the topic seem more important. Also, I figure this way I'm enhancing the chances that soon a course called that will be offered for credit at universities. Ideally, I'm thinking a history elective. Ooo, and there should definitely be extra credit for porn.)

I do not want to be a Fannish Heritage Neglector. There would likely be shame involved.

So if anyone feels like making me a sampler for any of the following fandoms, with a focus on slashy moments and other topics of fannish interest, well, you would be doing me (and Our Heritage!) a great service.
  • The Sentinel
  • Star Trek: the Original Series (But I've already seen The Trouble with Tribbles. Um. Almost half of it, anyway.)
  • Highlander (Ideally, with a focus on Methos, a character Best Beloved seems to find peculiarly appealing, although said appealingness took a slight hit tonight, when we found out his name is pronounced with a long E.)
You wouldn't have to send me all the episodes! Not even close. I'm just asking for, you know, a highlights reel. Like, if SGA appeared on that list, you'd only need to send me Sanctuary, The Defiant One, The Brotherhood, and Trinity, although of course if you felt like throwing in, for example, Rising or Underground or The Storm, that would be excellent, too. And if you wanted to explain why these were the critical episodes/scenes/vids/transcripts/insane theories posted on whatever fans used before they had the internet, well, I would love you forever and ever, and also, um. Be very grateful.

Sorry, haven't really got anything else to offer, unless you want a highlights reel for SGA, in which case I'd be happy to trade. (I doubt it, though. I think every fan in the universe has already been pimped into that fandom at least twice, and I suspect non-fans are starting to be sucked into the SGA Galactic Black Hole because of the sheer size of its Schwarzschild radius, and oh my god, now I have to write a story in which Rodney compliments John on the size of his Schwarzschild radius. It would make me giggle! And only me, probably, which is why I'm going to have to be the one to write it.) DVDs would be ideal, but we also have the technology to play VHS tapes, because we are very retro. Volunteers? Anyone? I stand ready to be educated.

And am I missing anything? If I know the canonical whys and wherefores of Kirk/Spock (is there canonical support for Kirk/Spock?), Jim/Blair, and Duncan/Methos, have I pretty much got my Fannish Heritage down? Will I be able to hold my head up if I am ever in a large gathering of fans? Will I be able to pass the undergraduate course? Keep in mind that I've already seen some of due South, SGA, SN, BtVS, and AtS. (And no one is allowed to make fun of me for being immensely proud of that. TV was an unknown country to me before fandom, people. I'm new there.)

And now that I've revealed my shameful lack of Fannish Heritage, let's move on to the service portion of this evening's programming, shall we? I'm requesting information on large fandoms, so it seems only right that I should be recommending from small ones.

Best FF That Shows Us That Travel Isn't Broadening and Love Has Nothing to Do with Never Saying You're Sorry. What Idiot Even Thought up That Whole Sorry Thing? That's the Wrongest Phrase Ever. Certain Dark Things, by [livejournal.com profile] jae_w. Bourne Identity, Jason Bourne/Marie Kreutz. (You should have seen at least the first movie to read this, and although I'm going to attempt to write the summary without spoiling the second, it's going to be tough.) Wow. I love this story. For me, the heart went out of the Bourne series (the movies, I mean; the books are a whole other deal) about fifteen minutes into the second movie, but it persists in stories like this one. This is just an astonishing look at the characters, at the way they lived between the first and the second movie, and the way they are. Neither of these people are perfect - um, and we're leaving out the whole assassin deal on Jason's charge sheet - and this shows that, and also shows why they belong together. Why they work together. This is basically a brilliant series of vignettes from Life on the Road with the Former Assassin and His Current Lover, and, frankly, I wish this had been the second movie. I would've loved it. The only thing I loved about the real second one was that I got popcorn. (The first one is fun, though. Things, you know, go boom, and also there is a pretty girl. I, uh, don't have high standards for movies; basically, if I'm sitting in a darkened theater, and I'm not crying at the end, and I didn't spend large periods of the movie reading in the hallway outside (Titanic, I am looking at you; I only sat through half of you, and my ass still hasn't recovered), I'm happy.) So. You know, just read this. It's amazing, and with an ending that just kills, and...did I already say wow?

Best FF That Perfectly Encapsulates the Outsider Perspective, Which Is Nice, Because It Means We Don't Have to Look at Flocked Velvet Elvis Paintings Anymore. Although I Suspect Some of Us Will Continue to Do So Anyway. Done, by [livejournal.com profile] elishavah. Boondock Saints, gen or I guess you could take it as Connor MacManus/Murphy MacManus*. But for me, this is gen; the incest won't be showing up until slightly later in this set. Yeah. (So, I bet you're really looking forward to the rest of this now, huh?) Here is another amazing character piece, and I love this because it shows what it must be like to be inside the head of a MacManus (ooo, that name) twin. Because, seriously? They speak their own language. (As well as, yes, eight others.) No, it's more than that; it's like they aren't even entirely separate entities, which is probably why they didn't ping me as slashy in the slightest when I saw the movie. (I know. I am branded with the Slasher's Shame: I saw the canon, and yet not the slash!) And I also love that this story fills in one of the many, um, plot lacunae (sounds much better than hole) in the movie, so perfectly it might as well have been in the movie. And, best of all, this has the kind of last line I dream about. [livejournal.com profile] sg_workshop was talking about opening lines this week, and although I never actually managed to post my comment (tragic browser crash; wit of the ages lost, except totally not), I had one, and it prominently featured my favorite opening line of all time: "It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen." (Which, in addition to its many other charms, is brilliantly poetic and nearly erotic when put through Lost in Translation.) But the thing is, compared to last lines, first lines are easy, which is why I am totally the slave of any piece of writing that closes brilliantly. And this story's last line - okay. You have to have seen the movie. But if you have, you read this, and it doesn't seem like much, and then...it echoes, is all I'm saying. Two minutes later (probably only thirty seconds for most people), it's just amazing. (Of course, two minutes after that, if you've been on LJ a while, you want to put it on a Boondock Saints icon. But it's best to focus on the first part of the reaction, I think.)

Best FF That Is Going to Make Me Happy Every Time I Mistype "Brian" As "Brain." For the Rest of My Life. Higher Education, by Resonant, [livejournal.com profile] resonant8. The Breakfast Club, John Bender/Brian Johnson, and, wow - that's a weird and probably unintended resonance in their names, isn't it? Didn't notice that until I typed them out. But all the more reason to slash these two, that's what I say. Although I don't think we need a reason beyond this story; this is the kind of FF that creates a fandom. Because, okay, my initial reaction to this concept was a hearty yawn. I did see this movie, yes, but I understood about .5% of it - all I really remember is that there were some desks. I mean, I had to dig up a plot summary to figure out who Brian and Bender were, even. So, obviously this didn't ping on my then-primitive (but now much enhanced and upgraded!) slash detector. I mean, it barely registered on my long-term memory. But I found myself actually remembering and understanding chunks of the movie as I read this story, and, even though Resonant never really describes either character, I started remembering what they looked like, how they moved, how they dressed. That's some impressive characterization, people. And the dynamic in this? Is just...perfect. I mean, absolutely, spot-on, dead-center...no. Here's the thing: the dynamic in this is the Platonic (only, you know, so not platonic, but work with me, here) ideal of a Resonant pairing. It's like she's been writing all this time because she was working up to these two. Now, I love and adore Res's work. And I rec it all the time. And I go into her stories with high expectations. And even so, I was stunned, because - well, look. Go read it, okay? You won't be sorry.

Best FF That Proves That I Am Dead to Shame. Also Possibly to Several of You, by the Time You've Finished Reading This Rec. Only Your Brother Knows the Places You've Been, by [livejournal.com profile] annakovsky. Super Mario Brothers, Mario/Luigi**. Yeah, um. You read that right. I figure anyone who didn't blink several times at the fandom and pairing has already read the story, and thus is no longer with us in this particular paragraph. But I'm hoping the rest of you stayed, even though it's kind of icky to imagine sex between little mustache-intensive animated guys who jump and, um, fight...turtles and hammers? I don't know. I never played the game; I was always more the Sonic the Hedgehog kind of girl. And, of course, there's the added ick of incest. Plus, because I really think this needs mentioning twice, animated video game characters, and I don't mean the weirdly androgynous RPG hotties, because those people are clearly begging to fuck in any number of positions - we're talking about, you know. Mario. And Luigi. Can I get a hearty ewwwww? Yeah. That was my reaction. Until I actually read this gorgeous little story, which is oddly sweet and plays on the Mario Brothers back story and is just stunningly good. Really. And maybe you're thinking: "Um. Yeah, still giving that one a miss, and happy to be doing so." But, well, look. I'm sitting here seriously considering using phrases like "wistfully beautiful" and "touching and gentle" to describe incest between mustache-wearing, turtle-jumping, pixilated plumbers. In other words, I'm voluntarily sacrificing what remains of my dignity, my reputation, and my belief in my own morals to try to get you to read this story. I can't think of a heartier, firmer recommendation than that.

Best FF That Shows Us That to Everything, There Is a Season, and a Fan Fiction for Every Sexual Act Under Heaven. Pushover, by Shalott, aka [livejournal.com profile] astolat. Mr. & Mrs. Smith, John Smith/Jane Smith. (And, yeah, you'll definitely need to have seen the movie to read this. But it is a marital, martial good time, so, you know, no hardship there.) I'm ending this set with - well, with more movie-based het. But there's a difference! Because this is het based on a movie that does not begin with B! And every other thing about this story is different, too, except that it is also very, very good. And, okay. I don't want to describe and discuss the sex act central to this story, because that pretty much is the story. But I will say that it has never appealed to me in the slightest particular. It doesn't even squick me. It just leaves me indifferent and sort of vaguely looking around for something else to do. Maybe a snack or a comic book or something. But this sex act is so in character for that charming couple next door, the Smiths, that I love it in this story. In fact, in a very real sense, this is the characters: their entire dynamic and the entire movie, summed up in less than 800 words, so apparently we didn't need all the bullets and mayhem after all. Just one, um, assistive device. Plus Shalott. But, hey, that's probably true of The Godfather and Casablanca and Dr. Strangelove, too, although we'd probably need a different device. At least, I hope to god we would, because if you put Ilsa and Rick in the places of Mr. and Mrs. Smith in this story, it suddenly becomes...surreal. To put it mildly. Oh my god, I'm sorry I ever even thought of it. Must go exorcise these images from my brain right now, or they will haunt me forever. Bye, y'all!

-Footnotes-

* Can someone more knowledgeable about Boondock Saints (I've seen the movie, but I don't remember this name appearing in the subtitles) confirm the spelling of the brothers' surname? This is how IMDb has it, but - these guys are Irish(-American). That's the whole point, that they're Irish. And yet this last name does not seem so Irish. So I'm confused, and I would welcome enlightenment.

** Do these guys even have last names? I honestly have no idea.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
Oh, how I love the small fandoms, the smaller the better. The first one in today's set can be considered, at any rate, an actual fandom; the other three are...a wee bit rarer than that.

So why should you read FF from a fandom you have no interest in based on canon you've never heard of? Well, in this case, because they're all absolutely brilliant. (There's other reasons - like, oh, the strange unworldly beauty of a perfect story written in a fandom so rare that only eight people will ever read it. Plus, you know, authors really have to be driven to write in such tiny fandoms, and sometimes what's driving them is genius. Think on it.)

Small fandoms are love, folks. Trust me on this. And read on.

Best FF That Proves That the Right Kind of Friend Can Always Think of Something Gripping to Do, Even When You're Stuck up a Tree with Distressingly Poky Branches. Priorities, by [livejournal.com profile] penknife. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Arthur Dent/Ford Prefect. Sort of. But, for me, this verges on gen; Ford always struck me as omnisexual, after all, and game for anything - ideally, something fairly perverse and sticky. (Well, OK, not the first time I read the first book, but I was nine. "Sexual" was not a word then in my vocabulary, except as translated "something boring that appears in a surprising number of otherwise interesting books." Although, oddly enough, I read I, Robot at the same age, and picked up on the slash in it to a degree that has, to this day, made Donovan/Powell my original OTP.) And this (I'm back to the story now) is so mild and subtle Douglas Adams could have written it. The story is bitty, but it's perfect in characterization and tone and just generally so in line with canon that I suspect Penknife of channeling Adams himself. Well, if he'd also had an interest in guy-on-guy porn, magical school kids, and mutants, which is actually sort of a horrifying thought. So. Moving right along - the great part about this story is what isn't in here. The more I write FF, the more I realize how hard it is to include just the bits you need and pare off all the extraneous bits. Penknife did brilliantly at that with this one, cutting out the explanations (totally unnecessary and unlikely to make sense in the Hitchhiker's universe anyway) in favor of pure, delightful dialog. And, you know, menacing towel-ripping spidery things, but surely that goes without saying.

Best FF That Proves Herman Melville Should've Spent Less Time Staring at a Supposedly Whale-Shaped Mountain and More Time with a Certain Tattooed Gentleman. Way, Way More Time. Taniwha, by [livejournal.com profile] makesmewannadie. Moby Dick, Ishmael/Queequeg. OK, first: how much do I love MMWD that I had to choose between several of her stories for this category? But of course I had to go with this piece. It's Moby Dick, people: the original Big Gay Book Featuring a Very Symbolic Whale (And Did I, Herman Melville, Mention the Gay? Many Times, Actually). But now: new, improved, with added Queequeg and gay! (Which doesn't even seem possible, but turns out to be.) And, best of all? This story was written for meeeeee*. (The book itself was not. Had it been, I would've said to Herman, very sternly: "Fewer and better whale butchering scenes, Herm. And when I say 'better,' what I mean is 'even less than fewer.' Get me? Whereas feel free to throw in all the gay you can lay hands on.") So my love for this story knows knows no bounds; every time I visit it, I spend a few moments being quietly but thoroughly happy. And then I read the story, and I'm really happy, because it is, well, the first part of the Big Gay Book, but from the point of view of Queequeg, also known as "the most interesting character in the book by a margin too high to calculate." Ever since I first read the Big Gay, I've wanted to know more about him - what he thought, who he was, how he ended up sleeping with (canon, my friends!) an American schoolteacher. And now I do. Because I am totally convinced that this is what Melville would've written if he'd a) been in control of his novel or b) been less distracted by the shiny glories of dead whales. For me, this is canon now. After you read it, you'll think so, too. Bonus: if you've never read Moby Dick, not to worry; you can get this just fine without it.

Best FF That Proves You Should Never, Ever Turn Your Back on Furniture. And If That Means You Never Sit Down Again? Trust Me, After This You Won't Want To. Wings, by [livejournal.com profile] stiletto. The Wishing Chair, Chair/Chinky. OK. I already know that there are two reactions in the reading audience right now. Many, maybe most, of you are saying, "Wishing Chair wuh-huh?" For you, I say: it is a children's book, actually a children's book series, by Enid Blyton, who had a really unsettling effect on my childhood. Unsettling, at any rate, when I try to read those stories as an adult, because subtext? Oh yes, my dears, but not the good kind. Still, I read everything the woman ever wrote, including the books out of print and the books never published in my country, and that has to mean something. Even if it mostly means that I tend to talk a lot more about lashings of ginger beer than any American or anyone of my age should. So, quick summary of the canon: children's book. Magic. A chair that grows wings and flies. A disturbing pixie thing named Chinky. Insipid children. Got it? Let's all now move on to the second prevailing reaction, which is, "Oh my god no no no eeee my brain my eyes oh god my precious internal organs all turned to ash and salt at the very thought, damn you. The pain...it is too much...dying. Dying, now - my sight grows dim. Alas, woe, dead." This comes, obviously, from those familiar with the series. My first message to that bunch is: get over it. I did. Yes, I died at the very thought, but I returned from eternity and read the thing, because nothing comes betwixt me and my FF. And you know, when you get past the horrid-bad-wrong-ness of it all, the story is actually...rather amazingly good. And it really puts the right frame around the disturbing subtext of the Blyton canon, you know? Read. Marvel. And while you do, try to avoid swearing purity and chastity in all things for the rest of your life, because that never works out well.

Best FF That Proves That Love Is Really the Key to the Universe. Well, Given Certain Vaguely Creepy Definitions of Love. Artificial Devotion, by [livejournal.com profile] katie_m. Galaxy Quest, but not the movie - the made-up TV show the movie was about. Oh. And the pairing? Let's just call it gen, shall we? So, OK, wow. This is FF for a canon that doesn't even exist. Fandoms don't get a lot smaller than that. And yet this piece patches holes in the show so perfectly and neatly that I kind of wish there really was a show, just so I could read more stuff like this. Or, hey, I'm not picky - I'll take RPF (like Livia's phenomenal and previously recommended Habitation). Or how 'bout the future of the Thermians? I'll go for anything. As long as it is as good and funny and downright brilliant as "Artificial Devotion," which shakes out and totally remakes an ancient SF cliche. (Basically, early SF writers' unfortunate answer to the puzzler, "We need girls to keep the guys happy. But what could females possibly do in space? Or science? Thinking is right out, and that leaves...huh. Wowee geewhilikers, that's a poser!") [livejournal.com profile] katie_m has a gift for seeing from unusual points of view, for telling the fascinating stories lurking just out of sight in a canon, and in this story, she writes very true to form indeed. She shows us Tawny Madison as a real person and her job as a real job, and it is utterly convincing and right and good and...and I just get wibbly thinking about it, obviously. So my advice: stop listening to me; I've got no sense left in me now. Go read these stories, instead. Because...wow. Just, wow.

-Footnote-

* I haven't forgotten about Pirates, by the way, MMWD. My ability to write it would be greatly facilitated if someone would release a single decent version of it on DVD, or, alternatively, if Opera a la Carte or someone would come back to LA sometime this century, ideally with Pirates of Penzance in tow. Working from the script, I'm finding, is not quite the same. But it progresses. Slowly. I did give up on the idea of not recommending your story until I finished mine, though, because - really. I'm not out to deprive people.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
(I apologize for the title, especially if you've now got the source of it stuck in your head. I'm not a big fan of the poem, either - actually, it sort of makes me gag - but it was all I could think of. If you've got an idea for a better title, I'd love to hear about it.)

Today I have for you stories from small fandoms. Tiny fandoms. You may not actually read all of these fandoms. You may not read any of these fandoms, or even believe there's fic in these fandoms. But you should read these stories anyway, because when someone writes a story for a small, small fandom, it's like divine madness overtakes her. There's inspiration, and then there's Inspiration, and it turns out you find the latter most often in stories from canons you've never even imagined fan fiction for.

Best FF That Features a Cookbook I'm Now Entirely Sure Is in Existence, Even If Pratchett Is Too Polite to Mention It: Concurrence, by [livejournal.com profile] debchan. Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Rincewind/Greebo. (Note: you will probably need to know the Discworld series in order to comprehend this story. But if you haven't read the early Discworld stuff, be ashamed. And then go buy them immediately. For this story, you'll want The Color of Magic, The Light Fantastic, and Wyrd Sisters, at minimum, but you should also get Guards, Guards. Because that one is the best one ever. And if someone reads Guards, Guards and decides to slash Carrot and the Patrician, I will be forever sickeningly grateful. Or maybe I mean sickened, but grateful. Whichever.) When I first saw the pairing on this story, I decided [livejournal.com profile] debchan was clinically insane. I'm not entirely convinced I was wrong. But it is a delightful insanity, one that could a) conclude that a wizard having sex with a cat even though the two never once appeared in the same novel was a good idea, and then b) make that concept work. We should all be lucky enough to be crazy in this way.

Best FF That Proves That Publishers Should Check the Internet Prior to Paying Authors to Destroy Noble Canons, and If You Don't Know What I Mean by This, You Are Very, Very Lucky: Ring Out, Wild Bells, To The Wild Sky, by [livejournal.com profile] keswindhover. Dorothy L. Sayers's Lord Peter Wimsey series, Harriet Vane/Lord Peter Wimsey. It's...het. It's canon het. It's non-explicit canon het. I feel so dirty, recommending this. But here's the thing. It's good, good, good. This story healed the injury that Jill Paton Walsh's horrible Sayers pastiche (I only read the one, although I understand there are others) left on my soul. Think I'm exaggerating? Clearly you've never read the book in question. In any case, this story is a masterpiece. I believe in this outcome for Harriet and Lord Peter and St. George; for me, forever, this will be what they did during WWII. I have to thank Genibee (who does not have a LJ, but should) for making me read this story. I couldn't have faced it without her firm recommendation. Because this is the kind of thing that can only be perfect or abominable. And, hey, guess what? It's perfect. Imagine my surprise.

Best FF Featuring the World's Sexiest Use of Mathematics: Written Proofs, by [livejournal.com profile] shrift. Ultimate Fantastic Four, Victor Van Damme/Reed Richards. Here is my proof that I can actually recommend stories from small fandoms that aren't small book fandoms. Yes, because this is...a small comic book fandom. Well, look, any English teacher on this planet will tell you that there is a world of difference between a novel and a graphic novel. In any case, there's oodles of tension between Reed and Victor in the canon, and we all know how that leads to excellent slash. Beyond that...look, it's superhero porn. There's nothing better than superhero porn, unless it is superhero porn that contains sexy science, and sexy science obsession. And nothing says "sexy science obsession" like Reed/Victor. I hope I have made a sufficient case for reading this story. I also hope I haven't, um, scared away the people who don't find chemistry humor hysterical. Come back, y'all! A science-free rec follows!

Best FF That Reads Exactly Like a Newly-Discovered Missing Chapter from the Canon: The Dancer from the Dance, by [livejournal.com profile] daegaer. The Persian Boy (by Mary Renault), Bagoas. Again, you'll need to know the book to read the story, but again - if you haven't read this book, why not? And you call yourself a slash fan! The Persian Boy is RPS in book format, and it's canon RPS, if I can call it that. You will definitely want to read TPB before Oliver Stone's atrocity Alexander comes out, and if you doubt that it will be an atrocity, just watch the trailer. It had me muttering and ranting for days. So, you know, getting back to this story, let me just say that it is perfect and I love it and it is so right for Bagoas. And I also think that Mary Renault would love it. And probably Alexander and Bagoas would, too. And so will you.

Best FF Featuring a White-Haired Entity of Unknown Origin Engaging in an Extremely Human Behavior. And That Behavior Is Not Smutty. Though I Wish It Was.: Peace.keep.er, by Mooncalf, aka [livejournal.com profile] tsukikoushi. Xenosaga: Der Wille Zur Macht, Chaos-oriented gen or possibly slash, in which case the slash would be Chaos/Tony. And those of you who have played the game will right now be wondering why I'm capitalizing Chaos. Well, I thought it would save confusion, especially for those who have not played the game, who might end up thinking that this is a story about the force of entropy and disarray. (And they would not be entirely wrong, would they?) This is a Special Bonus Nomination, included because it will be of interest only to people who have actually played the sprawling, delightful insanity that is the video game Xenosaga, and I'm guessing that's just me and my Best Beloved. This is about one of my favorite dang characters from said video game. Who I really hope will be better explained in the subsequent installments of this game, because there's a lot about him that's not entirely clear. Like his species, his origin, his purpose, his...well, everything. Mooncalf clearly understands him, though. Maybe she should write the next episode of Xenosaga.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
I dedicate this Slashy set to Isaac Asimov. I'm re-reading I, Robot (because I want to have some happy memories to carry me through the horror that will be the movie), and I've realized that Mike Donovan and Gregory Powell were the very first slashy pairing I ever recognized, back when I was 10 and innocent and had never even heard of fan fiction. That makes I, Robot my original small fandom. It's nice to know where all the madness started.

Best FF That Provides More Comprehensible Backstory in 5,000 Words Than the Entire Video Game It's Based on: The First Book of the URTV, by Mooncalf. Xenosaga Episode 1: Der Wille zer Macht, gen. I've played Xenosaga. It's a fantastic game. It's also really fucking confusing; I can completely understand why it's going to take five more games to explain everything and tie up all the loose ends. So don't worry if you've never played the game; you can still read this story and be almost as up on what's going on as those of us who did. And this story is coherent in a way that the game never, ever was, which is one reason why I love it. Another reason is that it makes Rubedo human and sympathetic, instead of repulsive, juvenile, and irritating, as in the game. The story also fills in a lot of the history of Gaignun (aka Nigredo), a rich and sarcastic good guy, and Albedo, an androgynous villain with great hair, an evil laugh, and a mission to be slashy.

Best Slash FF That Has a Lower Rating and Less Gay Sex Than the Canon on Which It Is Based: Pleasantly Surprised, by [livejournal.com profile] shrift. Velvet Goldmine, Curt Wild/Arthur Stuart. You really do need to have seen the movie to read this story, but I assume everyone who is reading this blog has seen it. You mean you're a slash reader who hasn't seen the Only Movie There's No Reason to Slash (Not That That Will Stop Us)? Go rent it at once. After you're done watching it, you can read this story and be, well, pleasantly surprised that Curt Wild, the quintessential insane rock star, could grow up to be reasonably sane and reasonably happy.

Best FF in Which Someone Finds a BBC TV Movie More Interesting Than an Unknown Universe Outside His Door, Thus Proving That People Who Can Wear Superhero Costumes Really Do Have Taste Deficiencies: Still, by Jane St. Clair, aka [livejournal.com profile] 3jane. The Authority, Apollo/Midnighter. This is another gay-in-canon couple. Makes you wonder why these are small fandoms, doesn't it? Well, one possible answer is that canon authors apparently really enjoy tormenting their gay characters; though you don't need to have read the comic books to read this story, you do need to know that, in the canon, Apollo was badly beaten and probably raped after losing a fight. But, no matter what your knowledge of the canon, read this and be impressed; Jane does an excellent job here of showing us a realistic long-term relationship. And she manages some post-hurt comfort that actually makes sense. And that's rare enough that maybe I should've called this nominations set "Endangered Slash Species."

Best FF That Reminds Us Just How Irritating It Is to Have a Friend Who Insists on Being the Best at Everything: The Ghosts of Women, by Miro (sorry, no link for her). GoldenEye, James Bond/Alec Trevelyan. Let us all take a moment to remember that Sean Bean is the patron saint of slash. This story really gets to the heart of why. We can believe that James Bond has lots of women. We can believe that Alec Trevelyan has lots of men. And we can believe that Bond would switch teams for Trevelyan. (And, as so many writers have pointed out, Bond would be more than a bit of jerk about that.) Be thankful, then, for Sean Bean, who makes every role just the right combination of slutty, slashy, and morally ambiguous. It's a recipe more actors could stand to follow.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
Small fandoms don't get enough love in this world. For one thing, there is no better kind of story with which to launch a career as a multifandom reader, or a non-canon reader (i.e., one who reads the FF without knowledge of the canon). And once you realize how many great stories there are in small fandoms, you'll want to be a non-canon reader; after all, if you actually tried to learn about all these canons, you'd never have time to read the FF. (Those who think this is circular logic are probably right, but I refuse to care.)

Best FF That Perfectly Reflects the Strange Mental Pathologies of Mostly Straight Boys: Dirge, by LaT. Urban Legend, Paul/Parker. The author says it'll help you understand the story if you've seen the movie, but I haven't seen it and I don't think I had any problems. I mean, I get the whole "we have a weird sexual attraction, or, god forbid, we fucked once, so we must hate each other forever" dynamic that seems to plague so many mostly straight boys (see also Y Tu Mama Tambien). So, really, I think anyone who has been to high school or college can get a lot out of this story; Lord knows it gave me flashbacks to any number of youthful misadventures.

Best FF That Sounds Like an Example of What Is Wrong with the World but Is Actually an Example of What Is Right and Good: Not Exactly the Galaxy's Greatest Romance, by [livejournal.com profile] daegaer. Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Arthur Dent/Ford Prefect. I'd been reading fan fiction for months and months when I discovered the existence of HGtoG fan fiction. I was shocked, shocked. A few months later and a few hundred meters further down the slippery slope, I revisited the concept of HGtoG slash. It still seemed somehow wrong, but upon reflection I realized it was the chili-cheese-chutney-fried egg sandwich* of fan fiction; somehow, all the wrong ingredients combine to become right. And now that I have embraced the belief that a really good writer can find homoerotic subtext in anything, including a toaster warranty (I will be founding the Church of Slashy Goodness next week), I'm actually surprised HGtoG is a small fandom. Really, the series is perfect for slashing, and it has the added benefit of producing remarkably funny fan fiction. I realize I've got rather off topic here, so let me just say: read this story because I thought it was humorous and strangely sweet. Thank you.

Best FF That Denounces Romeo and Juliet for Not Being Nearly Sexy Enough, and If You Think on It, You'll Realize That Is Totally True : Servants with Torches, by Jane St. Clair. Romeo and Juliet (original Shakespearean play), Mercutio/Romeo. Yeah, this is a semi-squick pairing, but it has the benefit of making absolute sense. I mean, really, didn't you always know Mercutio was gay? Is there anyone on this earth who thinks he wasn't?** And I love the way Jane's elaborated the relationship between these two characters. You know, Romeo and Juliet is one of my least favorite of Shakespeare's plays, but it produces strangely good FF, so I'm glad my teachers made me read it.

Best FF That Will Forevermore Make AA Meetings Seem Vaguely BDSM-y and Fetish-Filled: The First Step Is the Hardest, by Debchan. Action, Peter/Holden. (I have no idea what this canon was, but according to Debchan it was a short-lived TV show. If you haven't seen it, don't worry.) I once worked with addicts, so this story has a special appeal for me. There's something so fundamentally unsexy about AA and NA meetings; really, recovering addicts everywhere should send Debchan a thank-you note for adding so much interest to the first half of the Steps. Please note that I'm not intending to deride AA or NA by nominating this story. I'm all for anything that helps people get their addictions under control. It's just that I'm also all for humorous slash that offers an entirely new perspective on recovery. And, really, who says kinky sex and addiction recovery don't go together? They sound like an ideal match to me.


* This footnote has been written for the benefit of people who have not seen Red Dwarf. I say unto to you, go thee and watch it at once, for it is funny, yea, and good. And once you have watched season two, you'll understand this reference. But, really, don't watch it for me - watch it for you.

** Please leave a comment or send an email if you do, in fact, believe Mercutio was straight. You will be immediately live-captured and put on display in the Zoo of Improbable Thought (located, of course, in Hollywood). Probably you'll be put somewhere between Man Who Thinks Earth Is Flat and Woman Who Argues Incessantly That Creationism Is a Science.
thefourthvine: Two people fucking, rearview: sex is the universal fandom. (Default)
FF That Proves the Fic Author Should Have Written the Canon, Too, Except I Don't Think She Could've Talked George Clooney and Brad Pitt into Doing Some of This Stuff: Confidence Men, by Dorinda. Ocean's 11, Danny Ocean/Rusty Ryan. As soon as I got to the five-pieces-of-mail scene, my jaw hit the floor and stayed there for the duration of the fic. This is one of the few pieces of slash I've read that fit so perfectly into the canon (at least in my mind) that I've melded the two – this fic is another set of deleted scenes to me, and always will be.

Best FF That Should Destroy Treasured Childhood Memories but Somehow Doesn't: Summer's Men, by Kest. Dark Is Rising series, Will/Bran. (Yes, I've mentioned this one before, but I don't care. Some fics just deserve our unwholesome worship, and there's nothing we can do but give it.) I started this fully intending to feel righteous indignation and ended up only feeling that Kest got it just right. From now on, this is grown up Will and Bran for me.

FF with the Best Slash Names Ever: Telemachos, or The Genealogy of Buggery, by Resonant. Horatio Hornblower book slash, Hornblower/Longley. Did Forester plan these names - hell, these books - to be this slashy? Probably not. Those were sad, repressed times, people.

Best FF That's Really a YA Novel, Only Better and Dirtier Than Most, Not That I Think YAs Would Mind: Void, by Wax Jism*. The Faculty, Zeke/Casey/Delilah. This fic is brutal and sexy and strange. Just like adolescence.

* Note: link fixed as of 4/21/2004. If it breaks again, please leave a comment.

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