littleheaven: (Default)
littleheaven ([personal profile] littleheaven) wrote in [personal profile] thefourthvine 2016-07-24 09:56 pm (UTC)

It's so hard, and I'm so sorry you have to go through this. As a parent who has had to explain to her kid that Daddy has died and he's not coming back, I know exactly what it's like. You desperately want not to tell them, and let them believe that there's nothing in the world that can hurt them, but you can't avoid these things. I think you're handling it exactly the right way.

At 4, the Earthling processed the news of his friend's mother a lot better than my son at the same age, who just looked at me after the big announcement and asked, "Can I have an ice-cream now?" because that was his routine thing to do after daycare. He had no real comprehension of what "Daddy died today" meant, even though we'd all tried to prepare him for it. And every now and then over the 5 years since it happened he'll come to a new level of understanding about it, and then he has to grieve all over again. All you can do is cuddle them and love them and help them deal with it. It really sucks.

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