"Talking to Americans?" Please tell me more. It sounds like a continuing series on explaining difficult issues to people south of the border. You know: "Talking to Americans About Drugs," "Talking to Americans About Sharing," "Talking to Americans About Bullying," "Talking to Americans About This Very Show Right Here (We Suggest You Lie)."

And, yes, pathetically forgiving does about cover it. The first time I crossed into Canada I threw up on a Canadian border guard. (Car sickness was ever my bane, and as a result I threw up in a lot of interesting places.) He apologized to me. Even at six I knew that was weird.