This is a totally G-rated - or okay, maybe PG, what with the implied goat sacrifice and the undead and the hickeys (and raise your hand if you'd like to see the MPAA give a rating justification like that sometime)

Excuse me. I seem to have ruptured my spleen from excessive laughter. Do you have a tissue handy?

Thank you for this. I know NOTHING of Smallville. This? BRILLIANT.