Slashy Nominations 95: Wooing the Caress More Dazzingly When Daring in Full Dress

[thefourthvine]

It's another "dress you up with my love" entry; the only reason I didn't use that for the title is that I'm sure we'd all prefer not to remember that particular phase of musical history. (Of course, now we all do remember it, and some unlucky person will be humming that song for another 48 hours, but baby, sometimes you gotta be cruel to be kind.)

This entry, though, features no cross-dressing at all; frankly, there's a limit to the number of cheerleader outfit stories I can cope with in any given week, and that number decreases violently if there aren't any women in said stories. So instead, I'm offering stories in which clothes serve a significant purpose, a revelatory purpose - in other words, where an article of adornment acts as an agent of discovery, and, yow. Think I switched writing gears there for a second. But I'm not going to worry about it, and I'm not going to go back to correct it, either; onward and upward, that is my LJ motto. Onward to the stories, so that you can move upward to someone else's writing. So, once more unto the breach, dear friends, and close up the wall with our English smut.

Best FF That Could Almost Make Me Like Thongs, Only Not, Because Thongs Are the Work of Satan and No Amount of Fan Fiction or Ready Cash Could Convince Me Otherwise. Cotton, by Vera, aka copracat. Smallville, Clark Kent/Lex Luthor. I have something I need to get off my chest. Smallville has become one of my fandoms. I thought I'd just come out and say that right now; I've learned the folly of swearing in public - or at least here - that I will not acquire a given fandom, no no no a thousand times no, because then the rabid weasels come for me. So I'm saving myself some weasel-time by admitting I'm on the SV train now. And also because, um. Let's just say that you might as well accept the fandom in your heart once you find yourself explaining to your Best Beloved, your Best Beloved who has actually seen episodes of Smallville, in direct contrast to you, who has most certainly not, that it's a pity the show didn't start a few years earlier because Lex was made for pre-turnover Hong Kong. And defending that statement with supporting evidence even though the Best Beloved seems not just willing but anxious to let it die a quiet, unacknowledged death and blame it on the fever. So this is my first SV rec, to the best of my knowledge, and I've begun as I mean to go on, with a lovely story in which Martha does the laundry. No, really, that's the whole story. It's fantastic. (Yes, this is how I mean to go on. In terms of quality. And, hell, laundry too, but if there proves not to be a large archive of SV laundry stories, I will be forced to resort to smut. Just a friendly warning.)

Best FF That Makes Me Wonder If I Should Start Inspecting the Labels of My Clothing for Statements Like "55% Ramie, 45% Cotton, and No Moral Fiber to Speak of." Paddle to the CSC, by Julian Lee, aka julianlee*. Sports Night, Dan Rydell/Sam Donovan, Dan Rydell/Casey McCall. A new fandom does not mean I do not still love you, old fandoms! I'm as slutty as slut can be when it comes to fandoms, and I continue to read all my old ones even as I assimilate new ones. (Why no, I don't get much sleep. Also, I'm experimenting with various dangerous, completely untested time-alteration devices. They could potentially destroy the world, but apparently slash can do that even on a good day, so I'm not worried. Plus, when you weigh the importance of smut versus a stable space-time continuum, well, let's face it; we have clocks 'cause none of us is that good with time in the first place, so who is ever going to notice if time breaks?) This story revolves around the Shirt. Yes, that Shirt - the one that Gordon got from Casey via Sally; the Shirt that is basically the all-cotton equivalent of a venereal disease. Did you know the VD Shirt had further adventures? It did, and Julian Lee is here to tell us all about them. (Note: Dan/Casey shippers should not be alarmed by the pairing list here. For one thing, I'm pretty much right there with you guys, so you should know I won't lead you astray. For another thing, the Sam interlude isn't, you know, permanent or anything. Plus, who doesn't feel the Sam love? Well, not me. And, judging by this story, not Danny, either.)

Best FF That Reveals the Unsung Sexy Side of the World Wildlife Federation's Logo, but Not in a Way That Makes You Want to Call the Cops or Anything. Adorned, by Resonant, aka resonant8. Due South, Benton Fraser/Ray Kowalski, plus mention of Ray Kowalski/Stella Kowalski. (Note: if you are a diehard Kowalski/Fraser fan - and I'm naming no names, here, but one of them has been sleeping in my bed - you will want to read the follow-up story, Borealis.) Just so that no old fandom (all together now: "get new fandoms but keep the old - one is shiny and the other is also shiny, only with a richer, deeper luster") feels left behind, I'm recommending another of my much-loved pairings. This one is so much a part of my life at this point that when I typed "Benton Kowalski/Ray Fraser" just now, it took me several seconds to see what was wrong with that. Plus, Resonant. You all know Resonant, right? Well, if you don't, it isn't from lack of effort on my part. She's high on my list of writers I'd chain up in my spare bedroom if I wasn't concerned that a) that might not actually increase their writing output b) they might compete with me for computer time and c) they might also pick up on the unfortunate Stephen King overtones of the whole thing. Plus I understand there could be some sort of legal repercussions. Anyway, this is one of the first dS stories I read by Resonant, and it just totally reinforced my unhealthy feelings for her, because almost every single word of this story is perfect. (I mean it. If there was anything even approaching justice in this world, Resonant's works would be way outselling John Grisham's.) This story is about what we put on our loved ones, how we mark them and how we make them our own. And, oh, Jesus. Worst story summary ever, so let me start again. Ray likes to make things pretty, and that goes double for the people he loves. Now go read the damn story already.

Best FF That Made Me Strangely Comfortable with the Concept of a Peep Show, Which Always in the Past Has Struck Me as Just One Step Above Stalking and Approximately 30,000 Steps Below Any Non-Skeevy Sexual Activity. Nice Shirt, by glossing. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Daniel "Oz" Osbourne/Xander Harris. Warning: this is a work in progress. I don't normally recommend works in progress, but this one belongs in this set, plus each entry stands alone as an essentially complete story, so I refuse to feel guilty about this. Do you hear me? No guilt. Cannot be made to feel guilt. And I am not protesting too much. But getting back to the story - well, first you should know that this is all about this shirt. Those are not photo manipulations; Oz and Xander really do wear the same shirt at different points in the canon. And while that could just be a coincidence, or a lazy costume director, or - hell - even two similar but not identical shirts, it could also indicate another shirt with low, low morals. And given what the shirt actually says, plus my general opinion of the morals of the cottton crowd, guess which way I'm betting? Glossing is justly renowned for her Oz, and this story will show you why. Also, her Xander is just the way I like to see him. And I actually did have more to say about this, but here's where I'm going to be ending this story summary, because my keyboard has just developed an irritating glitch. Arg.

-Footnote-

*Thanks, laylee!

Comments

[laylee.livejournal.com]

Julian Lee, and does anyone know if she has a LJ?

julianlee

[thefourthvine.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I tried it with the underscore, but, because I am apparently defective, I failed to think of just, you know, running it all together. I will update the entry instanter.

[pearl-o.livejournal.com]

The most recent update of glossing's story is here (http://www.livejournal.com/users/glossing/130170.html); it has links to the beginning as well.

[thefourthvine.livejournal.com]

Whoops. Thanks for pointing out that I had only managed to link to parts 1 and 2; I actually did mean to link to her memories entry, but, well, I didn't. Obviously. I have now, though, so thanks again.

[delurker.livejournal.com]

This one is so much a part of my life at this point that when I typed "Benton Kowalski/Ray Fraser" just now, it took me several seconds to see what was wrong with that.
...there's something wrong with that?
*inspects sentence carefully*
Looks fine to me.
*attaches shiny gold star*

[thefourthvine.livejournal.com]

*gazes longingly at gold star*
*engages in internal dialog, as follows*

-But it's a gold star!
-But you didn't earn it.
-But she thinks I did! She likes the concept of Benton Kowalski, born in Chicago, whose housewife mother was murdered by Mafiosi when he was 6, thus impelling him to become a cop, and whose meat-packer father was murdered by a vicious criminal while on a package fishing holiday in Canada. She likes the idea of Ray Fraser, who spent his childhood in the Northwest Territories watching movies and reading music magazines, dreaming of being Steve McQueen and kissing David Bowie, but who followed in his father's footsteps and became a Mountie anyway - a Mountie whose Stetson hides experimental hair and who almost flunked out of the Depot because he couldn't hold still during statue practice.
-But you don't deserve a gold star for that, because that concept is clearly insane. Also, I think she thinks that those guys are the usual Ray and Benton, who, during a wildly bizarre wedding ceremony, both accidentally took the other's last name. Because no one could buy that other idea.
-But it's a gold star!
-Look, if we're going to go around in circles all morning, I'm moving to someone else's brain. You can't take it and that's final.

*gives the rational voice in her head - who is starting to sound suspiciously like Benton Fraser - a dirty look, nearly spraining both eyeballs in the process*

So, sorry, much as I want the star, I can't take it. The "Benton Kowalski/Ray Fraser" thing was clearly the product of a deranged mind, I see that now.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_swallow/]

Hi, I love you so much.

[fanofall.livejournal.com]

WRITE IT WRITE IT WRITE IT WRITE IT WRITE IT.....

[delurker.livejournal.com]

Seconded.

Re: Gold star

[delurker.livejournal.com]

*falls off chair laughing*
Take the star and run!
...no?

Perhaps you'd be happier with this one:

[√] Spelling
[√] Neatness
[√] ContentImagination
[√]Punctuation

...but I think you should have this one. (Given that you're joining the SV fen and all.)

[fanofall.livejournal.com]

Oh. My. GOD. You HAVE to tell me who finally got you into Smallville, because I owe that person BOXES of virtual cookies (or real ones, depending). I have literally DOZENS of these stories on my hard drive from various and sundry authors.

Also? Are you e-mail deprived again? Because I'm beginning to think your e-mail hates me...

[thefourthvine.livejournal.com]

As far as I can tell, I'm under an email curse; every account I touch turns to disaster in my hands. I've had some luck with emailing people from the Other Account, though, in that I typically get their replies, so I'll try that with you now. (The Fannish Account seems to be fucked beyond all repair; I get comment notifications weeks out of date sometimes and sometimes within seconds (and sometimes, I suspect, not at all), and my list mail comes in gushers every few days.)

Send me all SV stories immediately. Plus, I have a backlog of stupid questions that will be wending their electronic way to you if I ever manage to use email again, because guess whose Best Beloved is currently embarking on a TV show starring one man with giant lips and another man with a bald head?

And who got me into SV? You and MMWD did. Who else? As soon as I realized you were both in it, I knew it was just a matter of time for me, so I didn't bother resisting; that's proven to be a total waste of time, as I can't resist even one of you, let alone, god help me, both. (I'm stubborn, but I think this proves I can be taught.) I just buckled down and started reading without benefit of canon until something clicked.

[fanofall.livejournal.com]

SQUEE!!!

Okay. Will calm down. And will send bajillions of recommendations when return home. Because, you know, not so appropriate to be trolling the
Web looking for gay superhero porn at work....

[flyingtapes.livejournal.com]

Smallville has become one of my fandoms. I thought I'd just come out and say that right now; I've learned the folly of swearing in public - or at least here - that I will not acquire a given fandom, no no no a thousand times no, because then the rabid weasels come for me. So I'm saving myself some weasel-time by admitting I'm on the SV train now.

Coolness.

[starfishchick]

That SN story was EXCELLENT. Thanks for passing it along!

[gloss]

Oh, meeeeeep.

Thank you so much for the rec.

The story lives here and is finished now. I think.