No Heterosexual Explanation Moments

[thefourthvine]

Recently, I was talking to frostfire_17, and the topic of the No Heterosexual Explanation Moment came up. (It will not surprise you to hear that we were talking about the Fast and Furious franchise at the time. There are few other franchises so thoroughly inundated with such moments, I think.) It is the moment when you try, you genuinely, seriously try to take off your slash goggles and figure out what the writers, producers, directors, and actors thought was happening in a scene, and you can only conclude that, no, they must have thought the same-sex pairing was doing it, too. (It can also be the moment that a non-slasher wanders in, studies the screen for a long moment with narrowed eyes, and then says, "They are so fucking each other.")

As far as I can tell, there are two major categories of No Heterosexual Explanation Moments. The first is where the plot only makes sense if the pairing is, in fact, a pairing; I tend to put the first season of Smallville (what I know of it) into this category. Lex's behavior is just, you know, really really hard to explain unless he is very hot for Clark indeed. And the second kind is where it's just not something people with a strictly platonic, UST-free relationship ever do. Like, for example, when one cop signs "I love you" to the other cop as he's being med-evac'd out on a helicopter. I am pretty sure they don't teach that in police academy courses on Effective Partnerships in the Law Enforcement Profession, is all I'm saying.

But Frost and I realized that, tragically, we just do not have the depth and breadth of experience to make a complete catalogue of No Heterosexual Explanation Moments. This is where I am hoping you all come in. What are the key NHEMs of our time? Of past times? Of all time? Educate me! Bonus points for links to clips, if they come from a visual medium.

F/F as welcome as M/M, of course. And, hey, if you've got any NHEMs for threesomes, lay 'em on me. The only key is that even a person struggling not to see the pairing will still say, "...You know, I just really think they're doing it." (Obviously, if it is an actual canon pairing, it cannot feature in an NHEM, because in that case there shouldn't BE a heterosexual explanation.)

ETA: Spoilers in comments, of course! And the more the merrier, in my opinion.

Comments

[abbylee]

Isn't it made for you? Leads with two different hair colours! (On the other hand, I watched a few eps, and it somehow took me a stupidly long time to remember who is who, even with the blond guy having the very english sounding name.)

What really made me giggle about this show, though, is that it opens with two characters talking about missing an episode of tv (or maybe a movie, but something clearly dating itself before vcr use) and then moves to a scene where Hutch is showering in the background of the gym. Fully nude. And facing the camera. So again, clearly dated before vcr use ;)

[dastiel_gal]

Yeah, it was definitely before VCRs came in. When I was a kid, we used to arrange our social activities around our favourite TV shows, because if you missed it, it might literally be years before you got another chance to see it. If a mate asked you to go round to their house the night your favourite show was on, you'd check whether their family watched it before you said yes.

(Although, early VCRs would have been no help with nudity-catching. When you put them on pause, the entire screen turned to snow until you hit play again...)