Keep Hoping Machine Running (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thefourthvine) wrote2007-03-17 08:00 am
thefourthvine) wrote2007-03-17 08:00 am
Entry tags:
Poll: Hot or Not?
Recently, I was discussing the writing of porn with a party who shall remain nameless (unless she chooses to be named). The key part of the conversation went kind of like this:
Her: I'm writing porn that is very difficult.
Me: *sympathy*
Me: *rambling about ME ME ME*
Me, continuing to ramble: Like, when I was writing my Yuletide 2005 story, my recipient requested "hot het porn." And what I wrote was unbelievably not hot, the antithesis of hot. You were there for the shrieking hysterical breakdown, so I don't need to recapitulate.
[Note: For those many lucky folks not there for the breakdown: there was shrieking. And hysterics. And a post that is, mercifully, locked privately away forever, but can be summarized as, "I will fail my recipient and ruin Yuletide. I LOSE." In conclusion: porn does not come easily to some of us, and if you're just snickering at that, well, okay. I am, too. Join me in my club for the incurably low-minded!]
Me, still rambling: And when I reread that story, it is still the antithesis of hot, at least to me.
Me, rambling ever on: In fact, I don't think I've ever found anything I've written even remotely hot. Huh. Perhaps this is why I am so very bad at writing porn.
Her: ...I find the porn I write hot.
Me: Ooo. I feel a poll coming on.
And then I realized that today I would be in need of distraction. So - here is that poll. And it's only for people who have ever written any kind of porn, of any stripe, except the last question, which can be taken by anyone.
For the purposes of this poll, "porn" doesn't have to be NC-17 or even R; it just has to be erotic in intent. And you don't have to have written a lot of it. Once is enough! And it doesn't have to have been fan fiction, either. And any manner of porn - boy parts, girl parts, a delightful mixture of parts, merman/centaur (no, do not ask where the merman keeps his parts, for that way lies madness), tentacles galore, whatever - is equally valid.
Pimping of this poll would be not only welcome but, given the topic, entirely appropriate. If you know porn writers, why not ask them to come on over? I'd appreciate it. Distract me, people! I'm begging. Nicely.
[Poll #948511]
Her: I'm writing porn that is very difficult.
Me: *sympathy*
Me: *rambling about ME ME ME*
Me, continuing to ramble: Like, when I was writing my Yuletide 2005 story, my recipient requested "hot het porn." And what I wrote was unbelievably not hot, the antithesis of hot. You were there for the shrieking hysterical breakdown, so I don't need to recapitulate.
[Note: For those many lucky folks not there for the breakdown: there was shrieking. And hysterics. And a post that is, mercifully, locked privately away forever, but can be summarized as, "I will fail my recipient and ruin Yuletide. I LOSE." In conclusion: porn does not come easily to some of us, and if you're just snickering at that, well, okay. I am, too. Join me in my club for the incurably low-minded!]
Me, still rambling: And when I reread that story, it is still the antithesis of hot, at least to me.
Me, rambling ever on: In fact, I don't think I've ever found anything I've written even remotely hot. Huh. Perhaps this is why I am so very bad at writing porn.
Her: ...I find the porn I write hot.
Me: Ooo. I feel a poll coming on.
And then I realized that today I would be in need of distraction. So - here is that poll. And it's only for people who have ever written any kind of porn, of any stripe, except the last question, which can be taken by anyone.
For the purposes of this poll, "porn" doesn't have to be NC-17 or even R; it just has to be erotic in intent. And you don't have to have written a lot of it. Once is enough! And it doesn't have to have been fan fiction, either. And any manner of porn - boy parts, girl parts, a delightful mixture of parts, merman/centaur (no, do not ask where the merman keeps his parts, for that way lies madness), tentacles galore, whatever - is equally valid.
Pimping of this poll would be not only welcome but, given the topic, entirely appropriate. If you know porn writers, why not ask them to come on over? I'd appreciate it. Distract me, people! I'm begging. Nicely.
[Poll #948511]
no subject
Oh, god, the logistical stuff. That's a nightmare for me - suddenly I have to worry about, like, did I have him a shoulder holster? How the hell will he get his shirt off over that, what with all the tentacles? And, and, god, did I just have them have penetrative sex without ever taking her pants off? (Both things I have done, for the record. Betas saved me. Betas are goddesses who walk the earth.) I am so bad at keeping track of everyone's clothes and hands and just - stuff.
Disorganized people shouldn't write porn, maybe?
The stuff that I've allowed people to read has usually gotten a higher "hotness rating" (for lack of a better word) than I would have given it myself.
Perhaps this is a sign you should allow people to read more of your stuff. *hints in a totally unsubtle fashion*
no subject
Let me admit right now that I've made little diagrams of limbs. So maybe it's just a matter of forcing organization where organization fears to tread.
See, okay, I know this is not the forum, but I have been struggling with the porn-and-publish thing. First, I am a scaredy-cat, so I don't like to post stuff, whatever, that is my own problem and needs to be whacked with a 2x4. Second, my writing either goes towards 'what I consider in-character, slightly awkward and fully rationalized sex that is not embarrassing to share with fangirls' and 'nifty.org-worthy gangbang over a SAWHORSE.' I. uh. tend to write the latter, mentally, more often. Whoops! Maybe I should just post on nifty.