Yuletide Fandom

[thefourthvine]

So, this was in actual fact supposed to be a private post for future (Yuletide!) reference - yes, I really am the person who makes private posts with Yuletide fandom suggestions throughout the year, and it has always served me in good stead - but since I made it public I think I should leave it public. Bottom line:

Watch this commercial, which features basketball players growing up and then fucking each other. You think I'm kidding? You tell me what comes after the last shot. I seriously can't think of anything that doesn't involve cock no matter how hard I try.

(And then prepare to write it for Yuuuuuuuletide!)

Comments

[sapote]

I'd like to congratulate you on the birth of a new fandom.

[thefourthvine]

You should congratulate Nike. It is ALL THERE. I mean, they didn't exactly leave a lot to the imagination.

[vickita]

::gapes::

And then they done sex. The end.

[thefourthvine]

I approve of your concise summary. Now we just need someone to expand on it.

[libitina]

Sweaty and up against a wall.

[thefourthvine]

YES.

[giandujakiss]

yes, I really am the person who makes private posts with Yuletide fandom suggestions throughout the year, and it has always served me in good stead

I do the same for Festivids. Just sayin'.

[thefourthvine]

WISE. Seriously, it's the only way, right? Otherwise your brain shorts out when you do nominations and you have to live through the next year kicking yourself. Less bruising if you just keep a list!

[starfish]

I have not seen that level of eyefucking since S1 Smallville. Thank you for bringing this to my attention.

[thefourthvine]

God, I know! It's the kind of staring that is actually MORE sexual than a handjob would be. THESE ARE TWO DUDES WHO NEED TO FUCK EACH OTHER SOONER RATHER THAN LATER. Otherwise someone is going to slip in the unresolved sexual tension and sprain something.

[jenna_thorn]

And without clicking the link, I'll lay you money that I know what ad you are talking about.

Because yeah.

[thefourthvine]

If there's more than one ad this could possibly be, it would be an act of fannish warfare not to link me to them all immediately. Because - I mean - and the looks - and just - MORE PLEASE.

[dine]

um, yeah. there's really no other way to read it

and I for one look forward to reading stories about these athletes in a few months *g*

[thefourthvine]

ALL THE STORIES, PLEASE. THESE FINE UPSTANDING YOUNG MEN DESERVE A LOT OF BLOWJOBS.

[iceinyourmusic]

This is where it starts indeed.

[thefourthvine]

For serious. And we all know what you mean by "it," Nike. Well, it's not like you were SUBTLE about it.

[pocketmouse]

I remember seeing that one during the Olympics twice. The second time was a shorter cut, and they'd taken out half the eyefucking-while-being-pushed-apart-by-people shots. Probably someone had pointed out it was really gay.

Reeeeeeally gay.

[thefourthvine]

This is a work of cinematic genius that should never under any circumstances be cut. ONLY EXPANDED.

[teaotter]

I thought everyone made private posts about possible Yuletide fandoms -- or regretted it bitterly in public when fandom nominations came around.

[gwyn]

It never occurred to me to do that, so I'm always the person sitting there in front of the nomination form, staring and desperately trying to figure out some fandoms I'd want fic in or could write in. Imagine what this concept does for my J-ness!

[lemon_badgeress]

T_T. I'm on my fucking iPad, which refuses to load the last 13 seconds. SO FRUSTRATED.

[thefourthvine]

Your iPad is a total fucking cockblocker, and you should take it to a Genius Bar and get them to FIX THAT.

You need to see this in its entirety. On account of the brilliance. And the gay.

[oulfis]

Never before have I regretted my complete lack of basketball knowledge D: I literally did not understand this commercial. It is maybe set in the future? The only thing I do understand is that the two dudes are doin' it.

[thefourthvine]

You have grasped the key point! But, yes, it's set in the future; at one point Meng Ling is the Rookie of 2030. Basically, the plot is:

Watkins, who needs a first name, god damn it, and Meng Ling watch the Olympics. They have a dream. They work long hours. They go to college and become rivals. They stare at each other and compete against each other and dream about each other, and sometimes they watch each other's game highlights and jerk off, but who doesn't do that? And then they play against each other in the Olympics.

And then they have extremely sweaty sex in the locker room. And at the Olympic village. And basically for the rest of their lives.

The end.

(I know nothing about basketball, either, so the actual game details may be shaky. BUT I KNOW SLASH WHEN I SEE IT.)

[greyeyes]

And then they fall in love and live happily ever after! I like happy endings:)

I WOULD READ THIS FANDOM.

[thefourthvine]

SO WOULD I. OH, YULETIDE, COME QUICKLY. BRING ME FUTURE BASKETBALL PLAYERS IN LOVE.

[tevere]

Ahahahaha! My husband is a big NBA fan, so basketball is pretty much the only sport I know anything about. He'd seen this ad already, and agreed it was one of the slashiest things to come out of Nike for ages. (He's always asking me why there's no proper NBA fandom. I even looked it up for him on the AO3, but there were all of about 12 stories and most featured either (a) white guys, or (b) Jeremy Lin.) I even joked with him a few months ago that I'd offer NBA for Yuletide! So maybe I'll offer this ad instead *g*.

[thefourthvine]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. PLEASE OFFER THIS.

Also, PLEASE.

In conclusion: PLEASE.

[ceares]

see, and when I saw this commercial I thought it was just totally my slash colored glasses. Also glad to see I'm not the only one that makes early Yuletide posts--it gets me in trouble though when it's time to choose.

[thefourthvine]

Ohhhhh, no. No. I think we can safely say that this is the slash that everyone can see. Or at least everyone I know, and everyone they've shown it to so far.

[domtheknight]

I saw this during the Olympics and immediately tried to find it online so I could make everyone I know watch it and write me fic.

So far no fic, but I'm super happy you are spreading the word!

[thefourthvine]

Over on the LJ version of this post, Imp and I have sort of fallen down the well of commentporn, but I realize that is not the same as a real story. WE NEED REAL STORIES IN THIS FANDOM PRONTO. It is an ACTUAL NEED.

[toft]

Yes! yes yes yes! So excited about this for Yuletide since happydork posted it and thingswithwings suggested it - did your post arise spontaneously, or did you read that post too? I love the idea that this ad just DEMANDS yuletide to all fans who see it. It's so beautiful!

[thefourthvine]

I did not read that post! (So thank you for pointing me towards it.) But this post didn't arise spontaneously, either; I would never have seen the commercial if my entire Twitter feed hadn't been going, "Oh god oh god the slash it blinds me but I think I like it" and linking to the video. THANK YOU, TWITTER.

And, yeah. On the LJ version of this post, Otter just said this is the slashiest commercial she's ever seen, and she's seen the trailer for The Eagle. It is really JUST THAT SLASHY. It cries OUT for Yuletide. Or, you know, extra-Yuletide stories. Whichever. FAN FICTION, is what I'm saying.

[cereta]

I sometimes marvel at the lack of self-awareness of male sports fans. Do they really not see how very, very gay this stuff is?

[shayheyred]

They are too focused on the women's soccer teams eyefucking each other.

[liviapenn]

Aaaaawwwww, it's like the basketball version of that Ken Griffey Jr. and Ichiro article that I posted way back when! (Although Ichiro is Japanese. But still. Sports! Bonding! Teasing! Rivalry! Culture clash! N'AWWWWWWWWWWW.)

[thefourthvine]

Oh my GOD how did I MISS that post? (Actually, looking at when it was posted - the earthling was one. Pretty sure I know how I missed it.) THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND GLORIOUS AND JOYFUL. I am 100% on the Ichiro/Griffey OTP boat, here. SOLD, to the slashy couple in the Mariners uniforms!

[shayheyred]

Whoa. Serious eye-fucking there. I'm in.

[thefourthvine]

For real. I have not seen this level of eyefucking since Dom and Brian, and they had a whole MOVIE to accomplish what Meng Ling and Watkins must do in a minute.

[vass]

That commercial is adorable. Except that they're going to end up with a son who'll break their hearts by choosing ice hockey instead of basketball. You know this to be true.

I already made my reminder to self post about Yuletide. It was public, because who knows, I might inspire someone to offer one of those fandoms. And because maybe people will reply and I'll see what they're asking for and get interested in their fandoms.

Signed, very possibly asking for Peter Sagal/Carl Kasell for Yuletide. Or at least wacky public radio hijinks. (Wait, Wait with questions about fanfic?)

[thefourthvine]

THEY'LL LOVE HIM ANYWAY. They'll be retired by then, so after he gets drafted by the Blackhawks they can live in Chicago during the winter. Meng Ling learns to skate. Watkins can't, not after he fucked up his knee so bad - his surgeon would kill him - but he watches every game, grinning, because the point isn't the sport, the point is how much you love to play it, and he can see love in every deke, every slapshot.

...This commercial is DOING THINGS TO ME. Bad things.

Hell, I might as well post about my other potential Yuletide fandoms. At least the ones you can watch in under ten minutes.

[puckling]

I am now heavily invested in these two getting their happily ever after.

[thefourthvine]

AS AM I. OH GOD READ THE COMMENT JUST BELOW THIS ONE IT'S AMAZING.

[helens78]

I am from Indiana -- I don't know if you know what that means in terms of basketball, but rest assured that basketball is not merely a sport or a hobby there, it is a way of life.

I feel like someone just took the Magic Johnson/Larry Bird story and did a remake, updated so that the eyefucking and implicit porn could actually be written. OMG.

For anyone who knows nothing about basketball but would like to hear some things that ACTUAL BASKETBALL PLAYERS in an ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP LIKE THIS said, behold:

---

From "When The Game Was Ours", which is a book about the rivalry and relationship between Magic Johnson and Larry Bird in the '80s. A slashier, more soulbondy book has never been written, I am not even fucking kidding. I think the ghostwriter, Jackie MacMillan, is secretly a Magic/Larry slasher, because look at this:

Bird: What I had with Magic went beyond brothers.

I never let on how much he dominated my thoughts during my playing days. I couldn't. But once we agreed to do this book, I knew it was finally time to let people in on my relationship with the person who motivated me like no other.

*

Bird: We didn't like each other that much. It was too hard. We were trying to beat each other year after year, and people kept comparing us. I wanted what he had, so I didn't want to get to know him, because I knew I'd probably like him and then I'd lose my edge.

*

Bird: It's hard to explain what it's like to be linked to someone like that. We didn't choose for it to be that way, it just happened. And now we're stuck with each other.

*

Bird: We fought like hell for the same thing for over 12 years, and through it all, the respect was always there. For the rest of our lives, we're connected.

I used to mind.

I don't anymore.

*

Magic: "You're special, Earvin," Fox [his high school coach] used to say. "But you can't stop working hard. Just remember-- there's someone out there who is just as talented as you are, and he's working just as hard. Maybe even harder."

When Coach Fox told me those things, I'd nod my head, but in my mind I was thinking, "I'd like to meet this guy, because I haven't seen him." Truthfully? I wasn't sure anybody like that existed.

That changed the day in 1978 when I walked into a gym in Lexington, Kentucky, and met Larry Bird for the first time. Then I knew he was the guy Coach Fox was talking about.

Larry was a different kind of cat. He didn't say much, and he kept to himself. But, oh, could he play. I had never seen a player with his size pass the ball the way he did. Right away, we had chemistry.

*

Magic: I knew I'd see him again, and I did -- everywhere! When I got to the NBA and played for the Lakers, I watched as many Celtics games as I could so I could keep track of what he was doing.

*

Magic: Larry got the best of me. It took me years to get over it. Actually, I'm not sure I'm over it yet.

*

Magic: He admitted he was jealous, which really shocked me, because he never ever showed it back then. Of course, as you'll learn when you start reading this book, I had my own bouts of jealousy when it came to Larry.

*

Magic: I'm tied to Larry -- forever. That's just how it is. I wanted the two of us to walk into the Hall of Fame together, but we didn't get a chance to do that, so this book is the next best thing.

*

Magic: I knew while we were playing I was doggedly scrutinizing Larry's every move, but I had no idea until we started talking for this book that he was following me just as closely.

I can't get away from Larry. I bet he can't get away from me either.

*

Magic: What we try to do in this book is put you right in the thick of it -- like in 1984, just after the Celtics have won the championship. I'm stuck in a Boston hotel room, looking down at all those Celtics fans going crazy in the street. And you won't believe where Larry is!⁰

*

Magic: Can you imagine what it's like to have a player of Larry Bird's caliber pushing you night after night? It wore me out.

It took some time for us to get to know each other. It's hard to develop a relationship with someone who wants exactly the same thing that you want.

*

Magic: Inside, I knew, his heart was pounding just as fast as mine, but there were countless times I'd look at him and wonder, "What's he thinking?"

Now -- finally -- I know.⁰⁰

*

The forward [Bird] looked away, as if he had pressing matters elsewhere. For one brief instant, Magic was disappointed. "I guess he's not going to give it to me," he murmured.

(spoiler: Bird gives it to him.)

*

[Bird] was a young man of few words -- until he went home to French Lick, Indiana¹, and tracked down his brother, Mark Bird.

"I've just seen the best player in college basketball," Larry gushed². "It's Magic Johnson³."

*

When [Magic] looked down the roster, he was surprised and pleased to see Bird's name on the list. The Sports Illustrated cover had aroused his curiosity, and he figured he'd spend some time getting to know this Indiana State star.



⁰: I did not make that line up.
⁰⁰: I SWEAR TO GOD THAT IS WORD FOR WORD.
¹: I am not making this town name up.
²: Yes, "gushed".
³: I realize that we have all been hearing the name Magic Johnson for 30 years, but please, please, think about it for a second. Magic Johnson? Seriously, you could make a major living in porn with that name, especially now that wizards are IN.

---

But while Larry/Magic might scar me for life, THESE GUYS. I WANT THESE GUYS TO BE SOULMATES AND SAY THINGS LIKE "I DON'T THINK HE'S GOING TO GIVE IT TO ME :(((((("

[thefourthvine]

I just. I just want you to know that you've COMPLETED me, here. I did not know this book existed, and if I didn't know you were a person of your word, I still wouldn't believe it, but I do, I do.

GOD. I want this SO MUCH. There aren't even WORDS.

SOULBONDED RIVALS. BEST EVER.

(What did Bird give him? Because, okay, all I can think of is his dick, which - I am pretty sure is not the case? Although honestly I would not be at all surprised, based on this evidence.)

Whyyyyy don't I know more about basketball (<--literally the first time I have EVER thought that), so I could at least tell MYSELF stories of Meng Ling and Watkins, soulbonded, in love and yet in competition? Whyyyyyyy?

[isilya]

His name is Ben Watkins! You can see it twice -- once when he's named MVP, at 0.50, up in the background lights, and again at 0.51 when he's being interviewed on "TV" -- turn the quality up to 1080P and watch in full-screen.

[thefourthvine]

OMG YOU'RE BRILLIANT. I would never have caught that - I can easily hear them say "Watkins at the buzzer" in that one place, but I had to know exactly where to look to see the name even on full screen. BEN Watkins. YAY YAY YAY. Thank you!

[kyyrandi]

So I kinda maybe missed what the ad was actually for? Besides the gay-fest going on that is..


Also, what is Yuletide and why does it sound vaguely christmassy?

[thefourthvine]

OMG YUUUUUUULETIDE. It is the greatest! It is a small fandom fan fiction exchange that has been running since - 2003, I think. I've been doing it since 2004. It's HUGE - about 2000 participants a year these days, from what I recall.

Basically, the deal is - during nominations, you nominate rare fandoms (usually there's a limit; last year you got three). Then, during signups, you can request three or four fandoms, and you must volunteer to write - four? I think? But you can volunteer for as many as you want, basically. Any kind of fandom works as long as there aren't many existing fanworks for it - movies, TV shows, anime, manhwa, songs, plays, commercials, artwork, whatever. Any language is okay; it's not limited to English.

It's awesome. I've done 8 Yuletides so far, and I've written stories I never would have dreamed of, and gotten so much amazing stuff. I love Yuletide. A lot.

And this year, I am seriously requesting this commercial, because how could I NOT?